Masters-of-the-Universe-Piece Theatre Pride Month Special: “Ambush in the Mystic Mountains”

It’s time for another Masters-of-the-Universe-Piece Theatre photo story. The name “Masters-of-the-Universe-Piece Theatre” was coined by Kevin Beckett at the Whetstone Discord server.

Last year, I posted a Masters-of-the-Universe-Piece Theatre Pride Month Special called “Fisto’s Significant Other”, in which Fisto and Ram-Man announce that they are a couple. This is only my head canon BTW, but the various cartoons hint quite strongly that Fisto as well as various other heroic warriors are not straight. And besides, they do make a cute couple.

Fisto and Ram-Man

Eternia’s favourite gay couple, Fisto and Ram-Man

Therefore, I decided to do another Pride Month Special featuring fan favourite Malcolm a.k.a. Fisto and his significant other Ram-Man a.k.a. Krass. Especially since I had just picked up the new Masterverse Deluxe Ram-Man figure.

So enjoy…

Ambush in the Mystic Mountains

In the Mystic Mountains:

Fisto walks through the Mystic Mountains

Yes, I included a Delftware snail as a little Easter egg. As a kid, I used to collect snails – real life snails – so a neighbour gave me the Delftware snail as a gift.

“Ah, the Mystic Mountains, my old stomping grounds. Back when I thought that miner was a more viable profession than Master of the Universe. I mean, it’s certainly safer, even with all the cave-ins, glowing evil gems and the occasional Arachnid attack. But there’s no Skeletor, no Evil Horde, no Snake People…”

“Right, who am I kidding? I always knew that I couldn’t just hang up my sword and walk away from my hero days. After all, someone’s got to keep an eye on Duncan and he’s never going to walk away. And Teela, of course. And Prince Adam, since Duncan aparently adopted him. Besides, I like being a Master of the Universe. Okay, not the constant attacks and ever-present danger, but I like hanging out with the other Masters, feasting, drinking, watching Orko’s magic tricks or one of Manny’s performances. And then there’s Krass…

Whiplash waylays Fisto.“Halt! Thou shalt not pass without paying road toll to Whiplash, King of the Caligars.”

“You’re not King of the Caligars, Whiplash. Your brother Ceratus is and he hates your guts. And now let me pass or eat steel knuckles. Cause this is my holiday and I’m really not in the mood.”

“Oh, I’ll let you pass, once you’ve paid the road toll. And since you’re a Master of the Universe, I’ll give you an extra discount. I’ll only take your head and that iron fist of yours. They’ll look great on my trophy wall.”Fisto fights Whiplash“So you want to fight? Okay, shithead, then eat steel knuckles.”

“Shut up and fight!”

“No one tells me to shut up. Except my brother Duncan and that’s only because I like him. And now bring it on, arsehole!”

CLASH! CLATTER! SLAM!

Whiplash holds Fisto at axe point.“Ha! Axe beats sword.”

“Yeah and fist beats jaw. Say goodbye to those tusks.”

“You’ve got to get close to me first. And you’re not fireproof. And now say goodbye to your head, Fisto.”

Whiplash threatens Fisto with his axe, while Ram-Man appears behind him.“Hey, that’s my man  you’re threatening. Leave him alone or I’ll ram you into the ground.”

“Get lost, you puny little man! This is between me and Fisto.”

“If you pick a fight with Malcolm, you pick a fight with me.”

Fisto and Ram-Man fight Whiplash.“Oh yeah? Your armour can protect you from my torch, but it won’t protect you from my axe. And your head will look great on my trophy wall as well. Maybe I’ll put it right next to Fisto’s.”

“Oh no, you won’t.”

PUNCH! SLAM!

Whiplash runs away, while Fisto and Ram-Man shake their weapons at him.“Crap! Two Masters are too much for me alone. I should’ve brought Clawful. Or Beast-Man. But then I’d have to share the loot with them.”

“Yeah, run away and crawl back to Snake Mountain like the coward that you are.”

“And tell Skeletor that he can lick me in the arse!”*

“Uhm, actually that sounds kind of disgusting, Malcolm.”

Fisto and Ram-Man hug.

Unfortunately, the male Masters of the Universe figures are a bit too bulky to hug or kiss, though they can gaze deep into each other’s eyes.

“Are you all right, Malcolm?”

“I’m fine. Just a few bruises and a dented sword. But what are you doing here, Krass?”

“I was visiting my brother and his family. And since I was here in the Mystic Mountains already, I thought I could join you. Good thing that I did.”

“And it never occurred to you to take me along when you visit your family?”

“Uhm, I never thought you wanted to meet my family. They’re kind of boring and also still sore that I left to join the Royal Guard.”

“They’re your family, so of course I want to meet them. And besides, you know my family.”

“Yeah, because your brother is also my boss. But yes, if you want to meet my family, I’ll take you to see them. They don’t live far away, only beyond that mountain.”

“I’d love to meet them, Krass. And talking of family, I’d better call Duncan to let him know that Whiplash is waylaying travellers in the Mystic Mountains.”

***

In the 2002 cartoon, Malcolm is first seen working as a miner in the Mystic Mountains. Well, actually he’s first seen in a bar, getting drunk and picking fights, but it’s implied that he left the Eternian Guard to become a miner, before running into his brother and the Masters of the Universe during a mission brings him back into the fight and also costs him his hand.

Malcolm’s offer that Skeletor may lick his arse is of course a paraphrase of the famous line that Johann Wolfgang von Goethe wrote for that other iron-fisted warrior, 15th century rebellious German knight Götz von Berlichingen. I have no idea if Götz von Berlichingen was an inspiration for Fisto – and I even asked someone who’d worked on the Masters of the Universe toyline once – but the parallels are notable.

Whiplash, the reptilian Evil Warrior with the mighty tail, is shown to be a member of a subterranean species called the Caligar in the 2002 cartoon, though why a species of aligator people is living in caves rather than in a swamp is never explained.

Masters of the Universe Masterverse Whiplash

Whiplash ready to take on the world.

I recently found the brand-new Masterverse Whiplash figure at Smyths Toys (chain that took over the European Toys R Us stores) and took him home. The purple armour and helmet are based on some very early concept art for the character. I think the colour contrast looks great on him. What is more, I had completely forgotten that Whiplash gave his minicomic debut fighting Fisto.

***

And that’s it for today, folks. I hope you enjoyed this Masters-of-the-Universe-Piece Theatre Photo Story, because there will be more.

Disclaimer: I don’t own any of these characters, I just bought some toys, took photos of them and wrote little scenes to go with those photos. All characters are copyright and trademark their respective owners.

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Two Links and a Masters-of-the-Universe-Piece Theatre Double Feature: “New Dad” and “Orko Interruptus”

Today, I have another double feature of two new Masters-of-the-Universe-Piece Theatre photo stories for you. Since both stories are quite short, I decided to run them as a double feature. The name “Masters-of-the-Universe-Piece Theatre” was coined by Kevin Beckett at the Whetstone Discord server.

But before we get to the stories, I also have a link to share. Because the always excellent Christopher Rowe has compiled a list of contemporary sword and sorcery series characters and where to find their adventures. My own Kurval and Thurvok are included as well.

If you want even more sword and sorcery to read for free, issue 7 of Whetstone Amateur Magazine of Sword and Sorcery has just come out, so check it out! 

I had a surprise new arrival show up this week, when I received the Masters of the Universe Origins Young King Randor figure in the mail – without receiving a shipping notification first.

Masters of the Universe Origins Young King Randor

Masters of the Universe Origins Young King Randor

This version of King Randor is based on the 2002 cartoon, where Randor was protrayed as a somewhat younger and more active character than his Filmation counterpart. While the Filmation Randor mostly set around on his throne and occasionally gave a speech, the 2002 Randor charged into battle alongside his warriors on occasion and also seemed to do more actual governing. The 2002 cartoon also established that Randor was captain of the guard, i.e. Teela’s current, before he became king. All in all, I’d say that the 2002 cartoon features the best overall King Randor – and Randor is a difficult character, because his raison d’etre is to be the parent who does not understand or even see their child – though the Netflix CGI features the best version of Randor as a father. In case you’re wondering which version of King Randor is the worst, that would be the King Randor of Masters of the Universe Revelation, who narrowly missed winning the 2021 Darth Vader Parenthood Award.

Young King Randor with Prince Adam

King Randor with little Prince Adam, portrayed here by Bobby from the Dungeons & Dragons cartoon

We mostly see Randor interacting (and frequently clashing) with a teenaged or young adult Adam, but there are very few scenes that show Randor as a young father across the various iterations of Masters of the Universe. So I decided to make one. And since today is Father’s Day in the US (in Germany, Father’s Day coincides with Ascension Day, which was on May 18 this year), this is the perfect time to post it.

New Dad

Eternos Palace, the nursery:

Duncan holds baby Teela, while Randor stands over a cradle with babies Adam and Adora.

“I don’t know if I can do this, Duncan. I’ve led armies, I’ve defeated the evil forces of Keldor and I try my best to be a good king for my people, but I don’t know if I can be a father.”

“You’ll do just fine, Sire. Trust me.”

“Easy for you to say, Duncan. You’re a natural at this father thing and I honestly don’t know how you do it, especially since you have no one to help you out.”

“It’s really not so difficult, Sire. Just trust your instincts.”

“And what if my instincts mislead me, Duncan? They’re so small and so fragile and…”

“Waaah!”

“Oh no! Now one of them is crying. What do I do?”

“Maybe you should just pick up the baby, Sire. That tends to calm them down.”

“But what if I drop it?”

“You won’t, Sire. Trust me.”

Randor holds baby Adam and Duncan holds baby Teela, while Adora is still in her cradle.

“Come on, little Adam. You are Adam, aren’t you? Cause I can’t tell them apart. Marlena colour coded the clothes, but I forget which one is supposed to be pink and which blue. There, my little one, that’s better.”

“Coo.”

“Waaaaah!”

“Oh no, now the other one is crying, too. What do I do, Duncan?”

“She’s probably just lonely. Maybe you should pick her up, Sire.”

Randor holds babies Adam and Adora, while Duncan holds baby Teela.

“If you think so, Duncan. Come here, little one. Daddy has got you.”

“Coo.”

“Amazing. They stopped crying. And I think the pink one just smiled at me.”

“See, Sire? I told you you’d get the hang of this. Sniff. Though I think you’d better check their diapers. Unless it’s Teela. Sniff. No, not Teela. It’s one of the twins.”

“Diapers? You mean that smell is…”

“Exactly, Sire.”

“And… uhm… how do I change the diapers? And where are the diapers?”

“Sigh. I’ll show you, Sire.”

***

Fast forward some twenty years and Adam, Adora and Teela are all grown up and engaging in plenty of shenangigans and more adult activitiess of their own. So enjoy:

Orko Interruptus

Eternos palace, Teela’s bedroom:

He-Man and Teela are kissing in Teela's bedroom.

“Smooch. Are you sure our parents won’t notice that we snuck away from the party?”

“Absolutely sure. My Dad and your parents are both at the reception for the High Council and your Dad is holding one of his endless speeches.”

“I’m certainly not sorry to miss that. But what about the guards?”

“I’m Captain of the guard and ordered them to patrol somewhere else. What about Cringer?”

“He’s a very discreet cat and knows when to make himself scarce.”

“So the coast is clear. And now kiss me again. Smooch.”

Orko pops up, as He-Man and Teela are kissing in Teela's bedroom.Puff!

“Guys, guys, do you wanna see my new magic trick?”

“ORKO!”

“Uhm, am I interrupting something?”

“YES!”

***

The next morning:

Adora, Teela and Andra hang out in Teela's bedroom.

“And then he said, ‘Teela, I love you. I’ve always loved you’.”

“And then?”

“Then I said, ‘Adam, you talk to much’.”

“And then?”

“Then I kissed him.”

“Oooh!”

“And then?”

“Then Orko showed up.”

***

I got some dollhouse furniture at IKEA to use as props for my Masters-of-the-Universe-piece Theatre photo stories. The size works perfectly with both the Origins and the larger Masterverse figures. The cute dinosaur plushie came with the set, by the way. And yes, Teela would totally have a plush dinosaur.

That’s it for today, folks. I hope you enjoyed this Masters-of-the-Universe-Piece Theatre Photo Story, because there will be more.

Disclaimer: I don’t own any of these characters, I just bought some toys, took photos of them and wrote little scenes to go with those photos. All characters are copyright and trademark their respective owners.

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Same Old Debate, New Clothes: The Cozy Horror Controversy

Sigh. It’s that time of the year again and we’re having the same old debate again whether some interlopers are trying to ruin the purity of the genre and gentrify it by writing and reading the wrong sort of books.

This time around, the focus is not Hopepunk or what a certain podcast termed Squeecore, but cozy horror, cozy fantasy’s spookier sibling.

The current debate seems to have been sparked by an episode of the Books in the Freezer podcast about cozy horror (which I haven’t listened to yet), which received some pushback on Twitter, and in particular by a recent article on The Mary Sue by Julia Glassman on the cozy horror phenomenon and the backlash against it. Though the term “cozy horror” isn’t new. Here is an article by Jose Cruz from Nightmare Magazine, a horror mag, about cozy horror from 2021 and I’m pretty sure Cruz didn’t invent the term either. The phenomenon is much older anyway. What is now called cozy horror goes back to the ghost stories of the nineteenth century. A genre that – as Jess Nevins pointed out on Twitter – has triggered criticism and backlash for almost two hundred years now. And the reason was that ghost stories were mostly read and written by women. So yup, it’s plain old misogyny.

ETA: Jess Nevins also has a longer Twitter thread on the subject of cozy horror here – and promptly has some members of the anti-cozy-horror brigade try to fansplain the history of horror fiction to one of the foremost genre historians. I’ve even seen someone try to fansplain Lovecraft to Bobby Derie.

However, currently, most of the backlash seems to focus on Julia Glassman’s article from The Mary Sue rather than on the podcast episode that prompted the article. This criticism is not entirely unjustified, because the article is something of a mess.

Julia Glassman begins by discussing her issues with the horror genre and her problems finding horror she actually enjoys. I certainly sympathise, because I also had problems finding horror I enjoy. Though my problem wasn’t so much that horror was too gross or too scary for me, but that I found much of particularly filmic horror rather silly, sometimes to the point of self-parody. As a result, my attempts to write horror either turned into horror parodies or “Let’s find out was the supernatural entity wants” or both. In fact, I should maybe try to rebrand the Hallowind Cove series (which started out as an attempt to write horror and became a sort of horror parody set in a quirky small town) as cozy horror, since nothing else has worked to help those stories find their market. It was only when I realised that I actually prefer older styles of horror like the sort of thing that would have been found in Weird Tales during its heyday that I figured out how to write horror.

However, horror is a wide field and eventually Julia Glassman found that she enjoys folk horror. Then she explains how she discovered cozy horror, lists some examples and then sums up the debate that broke out on Twitter, when Sadie Hartmann, author of the non-fiction book 101 Horror Books to Read Before You’re Murdered (which would make a good subject for a non-fiction spotlight), linked to the Books in the Freezer episode about cozy horror and also offered some examples. Both Twitter threads are mostly people recommending books and films or asking for recommendations, but apparently there was some blowback, which has since been deleted.

Julia Glassman then continues to wonder why on Earth some people are so offended by the mere existence of cozy horror rather than focussing on genres and subgenres they actually enjoy? It’s a legitimate question. However, plenty of people decided to take issue with the answer Glassman offers.

Julia Glassman notes that for certain horror fans the only metric that counts is how much blood and gore there is and how viscerally terrifying it is. Basically, for some people horror is an endurance contest where he or she who can tolerate the most blood, gore and jump scares wins. Of course, horror is more than just blood, guts and jump scares and both Julia Glassman and Sadie Hartmann link to this 2021 article by Brian J. Showers, which makes exactly that point.

In the paragraph above, I wrote “he or she who can tolerate the most blood, gore and jump scares wins”. However, Julia Glassman points out that the person who reduces horror mainly to the blood, gore and jump scares is more likely to be a he. I’d add that this person is also more likely to be young, because horror is a genre that appeals to the young. Not that there aren’t plenty of older horror fans, but there is a reason that so much horror features bad things happening to teenagers.

So far, Julia Glassman has made mostly reasonable points. However, then she wrote this paragraph which is what caused most of the backlash:

It’s also undeniable that this problem is gendered. Endurance is associated with masculinity, and coziness is associated with femininity. Maybe that supposed femininity is what makes cozy horror feel so threatening to people who consider themselves hardcore horror fans. The cozy horror debate is almost identical to the YA debate: instead of recognizing that genres are fluid and multifaceted, people run screaming from anything associated with teen girls.

Of course, there are plenty of female horror fans – including plenty of women who love reading the hardcore bloods and guts stuff. Indeed, I suspect that the majority of horror readers are probably women, because the majority of readers of almost every fiction genre are women. Women are also the majority of readers of horror’s somewhat more respectable sister genre, the serial killer thriller. So no, female readers don’t shy away from blood and terror. And indeed, plenty of female horror fans showed up on Twitter to point out that they enjoy horror in all its blood-splattered glory. There are also many female horror writers. So in short, claiming that the readers and writers of the darker and bloodier forms of horror are male is nonsense.

However, there is a kernel of truth in that paragraph, because there definitely is an undercurrent of misogyny in the rejection of any genre or subgenre perceived to cater to female readers. You see this in the blanket dismissal of romance, of YA (even though there is a huge variety of YA books out there these days, a lot of people still think it’s all teen romance with a thin paranormal veneer), cozy mysteries, urban fantasy, cozy fantasy (even though some of the best known cozy fantasy writers are men) and now cozy horror. And considering that what is now called cozy horror grew out of the ghost story of the nineteenth and early twentieth century, the gothic romance of the 1960s and 1970s as well as paranormal romances, paranormal mysteries and paranormal chick lit, i.e. all genres associated with women, there definitely is a misogynistic element in the backlash against cozy horror, as Jess Nevins points out the tweet embedded above. The fact that several of those dismissing cozy horror are women doesn’t contradict this, because internalised misogyny is a thing.

The initial criticisms of The Mary Sue article and also the more reasoned ones came from within the horror community, but the debate quickly spilled out into the wider genre sphere. And that’s where we started getting seriously bad takes. Coincidentally, that’s also when several names familiar from previous debates popped up.

Raquel S. Benedict, whom regular readers of this blog may remember from the “Squeecore” debate of early 2022, explained why she believes cozy horror is a bad thing in this Twitter thread. In the course of that thread, Benedict also links to an episode of the Rite Gud podcast, which she hosts, where she and her guest Andrew F. Sullivan discuss the supposed gentrification of horror. The Rite Gud episode (transcript here) dates from March, i.e. it predates the current debate, so this is clearly a subject close to Benedict’s heart. Simon McNeil, another name people may remember from last year’s “Squeecore” debate, also weighed in on his blog.

As for why Benedict, McNeil and Sullivan object to the existence of cozy horror, there are several arguments, most of them familiar from previous debates. McNeil’s main point is that he believes that horror should make people uncomfortable and that cozy horror is therefore an oxymoron. He also dismisses several of the examples given in The Mary Sue article, particularly the 2014 animated series Over the Garden Wall, as “children’s media”. Now Over the Garden Wall may well be aimed at children – I haven’t seen it. Besides, as I’ve pointed out above, horror is a genre that appeals to the young. However, there is a certain sneering undertone in the way McNeil dismisses “children’s media” that you often find with a certain type critic, who tend to conflate “I don’t like this” or “I’m not the target audience for this” with “This is YA”, whereby YA is inevitably viewed as a bad thing.

Indeed, I got into an argument on Twitter with a member of the anti-cozy horror brigade (not anybody mentioned above, just some rando, likely young), who responded to a tweet of mine pointing out that while “cozy horror” may be a new label, the phenomenon itself is far from new and listing several examples with “That’s all just YA shit”. Of course, nineteenth and early twentieth century ghost stories, gothic romance and the lighter edge of urban fantasy are not YA and neither are the extremely popular paranormal cozy mysteries, but the tweet is very telling in that for some people, anything they don’t like is automatically assumed to be YA. This is not limited to the anti-cozy-horror brigade, but a far more general phenomenon. SFF with romantic elements is often hit by “That’s just YA” accusations, as if only young people want to read stories about people falling in love.

Both Benedict and McNeil also talk about the gentrification of horror, a metaphor likely inspired a handful of haunted house stories and movies they don’t like. Basically, the worry seems to be that since horror is experiencing a resurgence in popularity following the massive crash of the genre in the 1990s, more writers and bigger publishers will move into horror fiction and that horror will become sanitised and bland. Cozy horror is apparently viewed as a vanguard of this process – the first mainstream coffee shop or wine bar to open in the neighbourhood to run with the gentrification metaphor. Though personally I find the metaphor hugely problematic, because gentrification does untold harm in the real world by displacing and destroying whole neighbourhoods. People writing and publishing books some folks don’t like is in no way comparable to the real world harm done by gentrification.

Never mind that there is absolutely no real evidence that horror is becoming bland and cozy and sanitised. The examples offered are a mixed bag as well and include clueless articles about final girls on mainstream SFF websites, the recent versions of The Haunting of Hill House and Candyman, both of which were inferior to the source material (the new Candyman in particular completely missed the point of the original) and also got very mixed reviews, The Book of Accidents by Chuck Wendig, which I haven’t read, and two short stories by John Wiswell. However, clueless and shallow articles on genre websites are not exactly a rare phenomenon nor a new trend. Neither are bad remakes of better movies. And while John Wiswell uses horror tropes in his fiction, I wouldn’t call him a horror writer. Instead, he borrows the furniture of the horror genre, the haunted houses and the vampires and mystery portals to nowhere, to tell completely different stories.

The main issue seems to be a worry that writers some people don’t like – Benedict calls them “some of the most toxic, puritanical hacks in SFF” – are moving into horror and that they will turn the horror into “bland sludge”. As for who these toxic puritanical hacks are, they’re the writers who are currently appearing on the Hugo and Nebula ballots. I suspect I might be one of them. So in short, it’s another round of “writers we don’t like are writing books we don’t approve of and are ruining the genre in the process”.

The kernel of truth in this claim is that we have seen more fiction with horror elements appear on the Hugo and Nebula ballots in recent times, both published in explicit horror magazines like Nightmare Magazine or The Dark as well as in more general SFF magazines like Uncanny or Tor.com. However, it’s also notable that many of the authors in question – Sarah Pinsker, T. Kingfisher, John Wiswell, Catherynne M. Valente, Chuck Wendig – have been deploying horror elements in their fiction for a long time now. As for why we are seeing more fiction with horror elements on the Hugo and Nebula ballot these days, a) horror of all types is currently experiencing something of a renaissance following the collapse of the genre in the 1990s, and b) if Hugo and Nebula nominators read more horror and horror-tinged fiction, more of it will wind up on the ballots.

Also, the current generation of Hugo and Nebula voters are more open towards horror, whereas previous generations of voters had strong prejudices against both fantasy and horror. That’s why classic horror movies like the 1958 Hammer version of Dracula or 1976’s Carrie were no awarded, in spite of being very good movies. But they were horror and Hugo voters at the time did not want any horror in their science fiction. That said, the first non-SF story ever to win a Hugo Award, “That Hell-Bound Train” by Robert Bloch in 1959, was a horror story. Nonetheless, there is no great conspiracy here, just a shift in reader tastes and the boundaries between science fiction, fantasy and horror, which were always artificial anyway, gradually becoming more porous again.

As for claiming that some nebulous clique of toxic and puritanical hacks (never mind that the writers in question are all lovely people, at least those I’ve met) is moving into horror for commercial reasons, i.e. to make more money, that’s completely ridiculous. If you want to write solely for money, horror is about the worst genre you could choose, because it’s still a small niche dominated by small presses. Science fiction and fantasy are both bigger markets and for fiction, YA, crime/mystery/thriller and particularly romance are far more lucrative than any flavour of speculative fiction. And the big writing money is in non-fiction and tech writing anyway. So even if horror is more popular these days, it’s not a genre where you will make big money. And indeed, Benedict even says so herself in that Rite Gud episode.

Furthermore, there is absolutely no evidence that “cozy horror” is in the process of overtaking the entire horror genre, because of the currently big and up-and-coming names in horror fiction – Stephen Graham Jones, Silvia Moreno-Garcia, Catriona Ward, Gabino Iglesias, Josh Malerman, Chuck Wendig, Christina Henry, V. Castro, Grady Hendrix, Cynthia Pelayo, Alma Katsu, Paul Tremblay, etc… – very few are even remotely what I’d call cozy. And writers borrowing horror tropes to write different kinds of stories has little impact on the horror genre per se.

In general, the fear that horror – and science fiction and fantasy for that matter – are being ruined by big publishers shying away from more extreme material and insisting on happy endings – is just weird. For starters, there is no evidence for any of that happening. Manhunt by Gretchen Felker-Martin, a horror novel that’s popular with the Rite Gud crowd, was published by Tor’s Nightfire imprint, i.e. the biggest publisher of science fiction, fantasy and horror in the English-speaking world.

In response to a tweet by Ellen Datlow (who really should know better) claiming that SF readers no longer want downbeat endings, Camestros Felapton pointed out that the Hugo winners for best short story (as well as the finalists) of the past six years just don’t support this claim. Also, I don’t think anybody should be judged for wanting fiction with happy endings or fiction that is comforting. A lot of people have a lot of shit going on in their lives and if a reading a romance novel or a cozy witch mystery makes them forget their problems for a little while, then more power to them.

And even if the Big Five Publishers really did suddenly decree that all horror fiction must be cozy and have a happy ending – and there is no sign that this is happening – horror has a robust ecosystem of small presses, which kept the genre alive and afloat during the wilderness years after the 1990s collapse, so other types of horror would still find a home and an audience.

ETA: Nick Mamatas points out in this Twitter thread that complaints about cozy horror and happy endings taking over everything mostly come from outside the horror community, because actual horror writers and readers don’t have a problem with cozy horror or happy endings, even if this is not what they personally prefer to read or write. They are also more familiar with the scope of the horror genre.

So in short, the whole cozy horror debate is very much a tempest in a teacup. What makes the whole debate even more wearying is how depressingly familiar all of the arguments and many of the protagonists are. We’ve seen the same arguments trotted out during last year’s “Squeecore” debate or the Hopepunk debate of 2019 or – coming from the opposite side of the political spectrum – during the puppy wars of 2015/2016 – and approx. fifteen years ago, when YA SFF, urban fantasy and paranormal romance exploded in popularity around the same time and brought new readers and writers into the genre, who were not exactly welcomed with open arms. We’ve seen the very same arguments made by clueless German pop culture critics – who ironically hated horror with a passion – in the 1970s. And if you go back even further, you’ll find similar debates and uproars fought out in the letter pages of magazines and vintage fanzines.

In 2016, I wrote a post about the Three Fractions of Speculative Fiction, three groups of readers and fans with different preferences who have clashed repeatedly over the course of the past hundred years. In the past, most clashes have been between the traditionalist fraction and the anti-nostalgic fraction with the character-driven fraction sitting on the sidelines, but since the turn of the millennium, most conflicts seem to be either the traditionalist (e.g. the puppies and their various offshoots) or the anti-nostalgic fraction going up against the character-driven fraction. And while the traditionalist and the anti-nostalgic fraction will never agree on which books they like, they are usually eerily united in which books and stories they don’t like, namely the ones that are currently winning awards and acclaim. It’s notable that Chuck Wendig is hated by both the Far Right (for daring to put gay people in a Star Wars novel) and the Far Left (for being not radical enough).

In general, the argument boils down to a few points: “There is a new trend in SFF and I don’t like it. There are authors winning awards and I don’t understand why. This new trend is destroying the genre and these new people are all just in it for the money and the accolades, but they’re not real fans, they use the furniture of the genre without understanding it and they are violating the purity of the genre. This new stuff is not even SFFH, but it’s romance, YA or some other inferior form of literature. This means the impending death of the genre.”

In short, it’s all depressingly familiar and I probably should have just ignored this latest flare-up of this ages old argument, but the whole cozy horror debate annoyed me enough to put in my two cents.

Comments are open for now. Don’t make me shut them down.

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Masters-of-the-Universe-Piece Theatre: “The Prisoner of Castle Grayskull Revisited”

It’s time for another Masters-of-the-Universe-Piece Theatre photo story. The name “Masters-of-the-Universe-Piece Theatre” was coined by Kevin Beckett at the Whetstone Discord server.

Back in March, I posted a Masters-of-the-Universe-Piece Theatre toy photo story called “The Prisoner of Castle Grayskull”, set during the time in part 2 of Masters of the Universe: Revelation, when Duncan is imprisoned up in the dungeons beneath Castle Grayskull, after Skeletor took over the Castle, murdered the original Sorceress and turned Evil-Lyn into the new Sorceress, something Lyn isn’t particularly happy about. So Lyn eventually takes matters into her own hands, steals the Sword of Power from Skeletor and becomes the champion of Grayskull herself.

Mattel recently made a figure of the powered-up Lyn, called Dark-Lyn. She’s gorgeous, so I got her for my collection.

Dark-Lyn in all her glory.

Dark-Lyn in her full powered up glory.

Dark-Lyn poses with the Hugo trophy.

Dark-Lyn, Goddess of the Hugo Award

Three versions of Evil-Lyn.

The three versions of Evil-Lyn. I think I might have a Lyn problem.

Masters of the Universe: Revelation never really goes into what happens to Duncan, after Lyn gets the Power. We only see him again, after he has escaped from the dungeon with the help of the tentacled creature known as the Orlax of Primeria and joins the battle outside Castle Grayskull.

But would Lyn really ignore her favourite prisoner? I don’t think so, so let’s see what happens when the powered up Lyn goes to see Duncan in the dungeon.

In the dungeons deep underneath Castle Grayskull:

Duncan is chained up in the dungeon all alone.

You’ll have to imagine the Orlax of Primeria, since I still haven’t managed to procure a good substitute.

“All right, Orlax, just give me some more of that disgusting but conductive slime, so I can get the hell out of here.”

EEEYUUUBBB!

“Orlax? What’s the matter? Footsteps. Seems someone’s coming to see me. But who? Lyn? Skeletor? Or dare I hope for rescue?”

Frog-Monger takes Lyn to see the chained up Duncan.

“Sigh. It’s Lyn. And that frog critter.”

“Well, hello Duncan. Still hanging out, I see…”

“Hi, Lyn. Can’t say it’s a great pleasure to see you.”

“The prisoner is still secure, Mistress. I’m a good dungeon master, I am. I am very scrupulous about my duties. You will not be sorry that you appointed me.”

RIBBIT!

“I did not appoint you as dungeon master and neither did Skeletor. You appointed yourself, you slithering little salamander.”

“Frog. I’m a frog, Mistress. And I do good work, yes I do.”

RIBBIT!

Frog-Monger and Dark-Lyn visit the chained up Duncan in the dungeon of Castle Grayskull.“Well, whatever. Leave us alone now, Frog-Boy. Duncan and I have things to discuss.”

Frog-Monger and his little friend leave, while Dark-Lyn approaches the chained-up Duncan.“It’s Frog-Monger, not Frog-Boy. But yes, I know when I’m not wanted. You want to sing the mating song with the prisoner again. Then go ahead. Sing mating songs and make little tadpoles. In the meantime, my friend and I will go hunting for tasty flies outside the Castle.”

RIBBIT!

“What did you do to the Orlax, Lyn? Did you hurt it again? Cause it screamed.”

Frog-Monger looks back to say something, while Lyn faces Duncan.“Why are you so concerned about the Orlax, Duncan? Shouldn’t you rather worry about yourself?”

“Because the Orlax is a living being and it’s hurting. Not that you’d understand.”

“Oh by the way, the Orlax is scared of her. Always has been. He says she’s the Destroyer of Worlds. But then, the Orlax has always been a little dramatic.”

RIBBIT!

Dark-Lyn faces the chained up Duncan“Ah, alone at last.”

“Whatever you have to say, Lyn, make it quick, cause I’m really not in the mood.”

“Why so grumpy, Duncan? Don’t you have anything to say about my new look?”

“Well, it seems Skeletor managed to make you wear even less clothing than the last time around, which is certainly a feat.”

“Not Skeletor. Skeletor is history. I took the Sword of Power from him and kicked him out of the Castle.”

“Good. Then could you maybe give the sword back to Adam, cause he needs it. And maybe you could let me out of here, too, while you’re at it.”

Dark-Lyn faces off against Duncan“Give up the sword? Not a chance. I am my own champion now. And it seems that revealing attire comes part and package with the Power of Grayskull. After all, how else to show off those impressive muscles?”

“The sword isn’t yours, Lyn. It was never meant for you – or Skeletor. It was always intended for Adam.”

“Well, if Little Prince Weakling wants it back, he can always come and get it. But I’m afraid that he is much too busy sticking his own very unimpressive sword into your daughter Teela…”

“I have no idea what you’re talking about.”

“Don’t pretend to be stupider than you are, Duncan. In this very moment, as we’re talking, Little Prince Weakling is making out with Teela – yes, with your precious daughter – in the Talon Fighter at Point Dread. Though he apparently has some problems figuring out which part goes where.”

“Why exactly are you telling me this, Lyn? Do you think I mind?”

“Well, given the tendency of the Eternian Kings to sow their wild oats and then not follow through on their promises, you certainly should. Just ask Keldor – if you can find him, that is.”

“Listen, Lyn, even if what you say is true…”

“Oh, it is. Or would I lie to you?”

“You’d lie to me without a second thought. Lying is your second nature. Always was, always will be.”

“Ouch. Low blow, Duncan. I should punish you for that. You’re lucky that I like you.”

“So even if Adam and Teela are sharing an intimate moment with each other, why would I mind? They love each other. Always have, always will. And Adam is one of the best and bravest men I know. Though I do hope they’re being careful…”

“Ha, so you are a worried father, after all. And anyway, why did you give the sword to Little Prince Weakling, when you could have taken the sword and the power for yourself, could have been the champion of Grayskull – and of your darling Sorceress – yourself?”

“Because that’s not how it works. Adam is the chosen one. He has been since the day he was born. My job… and my privilege was to watch over him, be there for him and make sure he was ready to take on the burden of the champion, when the day comes.”

“Oh please! I’m sick to death of chosen ones. Your little Prince Weakling, Randor, even Keldor for all his whining about how Daddy didn’t love him, they were all born to privilege. Whereas you and I had to fight for every little thing we have. So who’s the chosen one here? The little Prince born with a silver spoon in his mouth or people like you and me who clawed our way out of the gutter?”

“That’s not how it works, Lyn.”

“Of course it is. I chose myself. I raised the sword, said the magic words and now I have all the power in the universe at my fingertips. I could rip Randor’s soul out of his body, if I wanted, or Skeletor’s for that matter. I could hurl a lightning bolt from the sky and put the fear of Zoar into Little Prince Weakling and your precious daughter…”

“Leave them alone, Lyn.”

“Or what? You’ll stop me? You’re my prisoner, Duncan. And even if you were free, you couldn’t stop me, cause I have the Power now. I am the ruler of Eternia.”

Lyn strokes the cheek of the chained up Duncan“But a queen needs a king. So what do you say, Duncan? Will you be my king and rule Eternia by my side?”

“Eternia already has a king. And I swore an oath…”

“Spare me your misplaced loyalty. You’ve spent more than twenty years basically running the kingdom and commanding Eternia’s forces, while Randor set around on his throne in his gilded armour, looking regal. You’ve even raised Randor’s son for him, because Randor couldn’t be bothered. And then, the moment something goes wrong, Randor kicks you out of the palace and throws you away like a broken sword. So no, Randor, deserves none of your loyalty. He never did.”

“Randor is my king, Lyn. And my friend.”

“King before friend, always. And anyway, after everything you’ve done for Randor, for Marlena, for Adam, for Teela, for the Masters of the Universe, for all of them, where are they now? Cause I don’t see any of your friends coming to rescue you.”

“There are more important things than rescuing…”

“Oh, I’m sure there are. Like Little Prince Weakling and your precious daughter making out. Or Randor peering very intently at a bunch of maps, pretending that he’s actually fit to lead anybody. You know what, Duncan, you’re an idiot. Time and again placing your loyalty and your faith in people who won’t do the same for you. You’ve wasted years supporting Randor who’s always treated you like a lackey. And you’ve wasted years on a woman who would never commit to you, who’d never even acknowledge you and your daughter, but would rather devote her life to this crumbling castle….”

“If I wasted years of my life, then I at least wasted them on people who are worthy and causes that matter. Whereas you wasted years of your life on Skeletor.”

“Yes, but I got wise and kicked him out. He’s running for the Mystic Mountains now, crawling back to his brother. But that reunion won’t go the way Skeletors hopes and I for one just wish I could be there to see Randor kick his arse and throw him in the deepest darkest dungeon… But wait, I can. I have the Power now and I can see anything, go anywhere in the whole universe.”

“If you can go literally anywhere in the universe, then why are you down here in the dungeon with me?”

Lyn strokes the cheek of the chained up Duncan.“Isn’t it obvious, Duncan? Because I like you. And because having all this power at my fingertips, seeing the entire universe, seeing how lonely and desolate and devoid of meaning it all is makes me want to find solace in the arms of another human being. Skeletor was right, you know, whenever he went on about the loneliness of good and evil. Your little Prince knows it, too. That’s why he’s hanging out with imbeciles like Orko or Cringer and seeking comfort in the arms of your precious daughter, provided he can finally figure what to do. Because it’s lonely being a god. And I don’t want to be lonely…”

“Lyn…”

“Hush, Duncan. You know loneliness, too, don’t you? All those years pining after a woman who didn’t want you, who would not commit to you and your daughter…”

“She had her duty…”

“Oh please! Teela-Na could’ve found a way to make it work, if she’d wanted to. But she didn’t. And deep down in your heart you know. You know that this crumbling pile of stones always meant more to her than you and even her own child. Just as this crumbling Castle and the power buried within it always meant more to Skeletor than I ever could. So yes, Duncan, we’re both lonely. So why shouldn’t we find comfort in each other’s arms?”

“Will… will you unchain me? Cause otherwise this might be difficult.”

“You don’t like a woman to take control, do you? But no, the chains stay on. Trust me, it’s more fun that way.”

“Will you at least power down? You’re not used to the power and don’t know your own strength yet.”

“Oh please! Do you think I’m stupid. That’s how I got Skeletor. I seduced him, persuaded him to power down and stole the sword from him. Do you honestly think I’d fall for the same trick?”

“It was worth a try.”

Lyn storms off and leaves the chained up Duncan hanging.“You know what, Duncan? I’m sick of you, sick of Skeletor, sick of it all. You can stay here in the dungeon, pine for your dear departed Sorceress and rot for all I care. Me, I’ve got a whole universe, no, a whole multiverse to explore. And since this whole multiverse is lonely and desolate and uncaring, maybe it’s time someone put it out of its misery.”

“Lyn, wait….”

Duncan is chained up in the dungeon all alone.“Great, Duncan. You just blew another chance at finally getting out of here. And why? Because you couldn’t submit to Lyn? Couldn’t lay back and think of Eternia just once. Oh well, back to Plan A. Orlax, are you still there?”

Eeeeeyoooo!

“I’ll take that as a ‘yes’. Can you give me some more of that disgusting but highly conductive slime.”

SCREECH.

“Sigh. What now? Lyn, is that you?”

Frog Monger confronts Duncan.“Oh. It’s you. What do you want? Gloat some more? Listen, if you want revenge for being imprisoned down here, you’ve got the wrong man. You’ve been here since before I ever set foot in this Castle.”

“I don’t want revenge. I just have some advice, from one prisoner to another. That one, the tall female, she be crazy.”

“Lyn? Yes, I know.”

“But you don’t know all of it. The Orlax, he’s scared of her. He says she’s the Destroyer of Worlds, the one he came to warn all of you humans about, except that you wouldn’t listen, that you never listen.”

“Listen how? No one can even figure out what the Orlax means to say.”

“Well, I’m telling you what the Orlax means to say. He says that one, the tall female, is the Destroyer of Worlds who brought death and destruction to the Orlax’s homeworld and laid waste to entire universes. Now I don’t know if the Orlax is right, but I know that the tall female is crazy. I also know that she likes you. So sing mating songs with her. Make little tadpoles. Anything to stop her from destroying the universe.”

RIBBIT!

“Why do you even care, Frog Monger?”

“Why I care? Because I live in this universe, too. It’s not always been kind to me, but I still live here. And besides, this universe also has nice things like big fat flies, cool ponds and shady swamps. I don’t want all that destroyed.”

RIBBIT!

“So you want me to do what exactly? Offer up my body, so that Lyn won’t destroy the universe?”

“Now you understand, human.”

RIBBIT!

***

In Masters of the Universe: Revelation, Lyn does suffer an existential crisis at the realisation that she lives in an uncaring universe where God is dead and everybody is alone. In many ways, she’s a Lovecraft protagonist faced with the horrors of the cosmos. But while Lovecraft protagonists curl up and go mad, Lyn decides to put the entire universe and everybody in it out of her misery and is only barely stopped by all the heroes and even Skeletor working together.

It is also notable that unlike almost everybody else who wields the Power of Grayskull, Adam does not go mad, does not rip out anybody’s soul nor does he try to destroy the universe because it’s cold and uncaring. However, unlike almost everybody else who wields the Power of Grayskull, Adam also has a strong support system of friends and loved ones.

As for Lyn and Duncan, both of whom are alive and single at the end of Masters of the Universe: Revelation, will they eventually get together? I guess we’ll find out in Masters of the Universe: Revolution next year.

That’s it for today, folks. I hope you enjoyed this Masters-of-the-Universe-Piece Theatre Photo Story, because there will be more.

Disclaimer: I don’t own any of these characters, I just bought some toys, took photos of them and wrote little scenes to go with those photos. All characters are copyright and trademark their respective owners.

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Non-Fiction Spotlight: D20 or Die!: Memories of Old School Role-Playing Games from Today’s Grown-Up Kids, edited by Jim Beard

The finalists for the 2023 Hugo Awards still haven’t been announced, though the announcement is expected later this month.

However, after the Hugos is before the next Hugos, so I’m continuing my Non-Fiction Spotlight project, where I interview the authors/editors of SFF-related non-fiction books that come out in 2023 and are eligible for the 2024 Hugo Awards. For more about the Non-Fiction Spotlight project, go here. To check out the spotlights I already posted, go here.

For more recommendations for SFF-related non-fiction, also check out this Facebook group set up by the always excellent Farah Mendlesohn, who is a champion (and author) of SFF-related non-fiction.

I’ve already featured quite a few RPG and gaming related books in the course of the Non-Fiction Spotlight project. Today’s non-fiction spotlight is another RPG related book. However, this time around the focus is less on the development and history of RPGS, but on the experiences and memories of people who played those games as children and teenagers.

So I’m thrilled to welcome Jim Beard, editor of D20 or Die!: Memories of Old School Role-Playing Games from Today’s Grown-Up Kids, to my blog today.

D20 or Die!, edited by Jim Beard

Tell us about your book.

D20 OR DIE! is a collection of essays by writers who grew up with all the classic table-top role-playing games like D&D, Traveller, Call of Cthulhu, Gamma World, etc.

Tell us a little bit about yourself.

I’m a writer, editor, and self-publisher. I have two publishing “houses,” Flinch Books with John C. Bruening, and Becky Books by myself. Becky Books is in honor of my late wife, Becky.

What prompted you to write/edit this book?

It’s the fourth volume in my ongoing “Memories from Today’s Grown-Up Kids” series of childhood recollections and observations. I like to pick tpocs that I know will resonate with pop culture fans, as well as ones that aren’t covered in this way in publishing.

Why should SFF fans in general and Hugo voters in particular read this book?

Because no matter what the theme is, they will see themselves in the personal essays. That’s the beauty of these books, I think, that we all have these shared experiences and we like to see echoes of our own lives in what we read. Beyond that, if you love RPGs and began playing as a kid, you’re going to love this book.

Do you have any cool facts or tidbits that you unearthed during your research, but that did not make it into the final book?

That some of the essayists actually connected with important figures in early gaming, and that the so-called “Satanic Panic” of the 80s impacted people more deeply than I realized.

SFF-related non-fiction is somewhat sidelined by the big genre awards, since the Nebulas have no non-fiction category and the Best Related Work Hugo category has become something of a grab bag of anything that doesn’t fit elsewhere. So why do you think SFF-related non-fiction is important?

Maybe because it gives us that look behind the curtain that many of us love, as well as providing inspiration for burgeoning creators to see what it was like for others at young and impressionable points in their development. I personally really dig knowing how things came together and the sometimes-struggles we never really hear about once things get big and popular.

Are there any other great SFF-related non-fiction works or indeed anything else (books, stories, essays, writers, magazines, films, TV shows, etc…) you’d like to recommend?

Wow! Too many! That said, I’m currently reading the Prequels edition of the STAR WARS ARCHIVES books and enjoying the vintage interviews with George Lucas and his staff while they’re making the films.

Where can people buy your book?

Amazon, Amazon, and Amazon!

Where can people find you?

I’m on Facebook at https://www.facebook.com/thebeardjimbeard/, Amazon at http://www.amazon.com/author/jimbeard, and on Twitter @writerjimbeard.

Thank you, Jim, for stopping by and answering my questions. Do check out D20 or Die!: Memories of Old School Role-Playing Games from Today’s Grown-Up Kids, because it’s a great essay collection.

About D20 or Die!: Memories of Old School Role-Playing Games from Today’s Grown-Up Kids:

ROLL FOR INITIATIVE!

A secret society once existed across the land, a roving band of thrill-seekers who defied the conventional pursuits of their elders to take on new personas in strange adventures that would shock the world! In basements, on back porches, and under barn roofs, they rolled the dice to decide their fates, hungry to play the ultimate games of chance!

This titanic tome will transport you back in time to the 1970s and 80s, an era when role-playing games such as Dungeons & Dragons, Champions, and Traveller were new and exciting, attracting kids of all ages to draw fire from dragons, battle baneful bad guys, and surf the spaceways—all from the safety of a common card table.

In D20 or Die! writer-editor Jim Beard acts as a game-playing guru as he expands his “Memories from Today’s Grown-Up Kids” series of pop-culture reminisces to crack the covers of all the classic, old-school, tabletop role-playing games of legend and lore! Just watch those hit points, adventurers!

Cover illustration by M. Mrakota Orsman
Interior design and formatting by Maggie Ryel

About Jim Beard:

Jim Beard pounds out adventure fiction with classic pulp style and flair.

A native Toledoan, he was introduced to comic books at an early age by his father, who passed on to him a love for the medium and the pulp characters who preceded it. After decades of reading, collecting and dissecting comics, Jim became a published writer when he sold a story to DC Comics in 2002. Since that time he’s written official Spider-Man, X-Files, and Planet of the Apes prose fiction, Star Wars and Ghostbusters comic stories, and contributed articles and essays to several volumes of comic book history.

His prose work also includes GOTHAM CITY 14 MILES, a book of essays on the 1966 Batman TV series; SGT. JANUS, SPIRIT-BREAKER, a collection of pulp ghost stories featuring an Edwardian occult detective; MONSTER EARTH, a shared-world giant monster anthology; and CAPTAIN ACTION: RIDDLE OF THE GLOWING MEN, the first pulp prose novel based on the classic 1960s action figure.

Jim is also the co-publisher at Flinch Books, a small-press pulp house.

***

Are you publishing a work of SFF-related longform non-fiction in 2023 and want it featured? Contact me or leave a comment.

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First Monday Free Fiction: “Mementos and Memories”

Honourable Enemies by Cora Buhlert

Welcome to the June 2023 edition of First Monday Free Fiction.

To recap, inspired by Kristine Kathryn Rusch who posts a free short story every week on her blog, I’ll post a free story on the first Monday of every month. At the end of the month, I’ll take the story down and post another.

June is Pride Month, so this month’s free story is a sweet gay romance in my In Love and War space opera series called Mementos and Memories.

So accompany Anjali and Mikhail as they follow the trail of…

Mementos and Memories

The rim world of Sentosa was a planet of oceans and swamps, shrouded in clouds that rarely tore open to let the rays of its sun shine through. Islands were scattered across the world ocean, none of them large enough to qualify as a continent.

The capital Kota Terapung was built on an archipelago, its islands connected by a maze of bridges and causeways. The city was famous for its floating market. Vendors flocked here from all over the planet and beyond to moor their boats along the wooden walkways or dock their spacecraft on the floating platforms. Here — it was said — one could find almost any good, legal or illegal, in the known universe.

A young couple strolled along the wooden walkways of the floating market hand in hand. The man was tall, with pale skin, striking blue eyes and long dark hair that he wore pulled into a ponytail at the nape of his neck. He was clad from head to toe in black, boots, utility pants, shirt, topped with a long coat of black synth-leather. On his hip, he wore a blaster, Republican standard military issue. This was Captain Mikhail Alexeievich Grikov, formerly of the Republican Special Commando Forces, now a wanted traitor and deserter.

The woman by his side was a good head shorter, with brown skin, dark eyes and glossy black hair that fell down her back in gentle waves. She was clad in a flowing skirt with a matching top and bejewelled sandals, all in shades of green and maroon. On her waist, she wore a dagger with an ornate crested hilt. A necklace with a striking gold and garnet pendant gleamed at her throat and on her wrist she wore a matching bangle. This was Lieutenant Anjali Patel, formerly of the Imperial Shakyri Expeditionary Corps, now a wanted traitor and deserter.

Anjali allowed herself to lean against Mikhail and soak up the atmosphere. In many ways, the floating market of Kota Terapung reminded her of the markets of her homeworld of Rajipuri. Of course, the markets of Rajipuri — at least those in the Gurung Highlands, where Anjali had grown up — were on firm ground and not a tangle of boats and walkways. But the calls of the vendors, the array of wares on offer, the smells and the whole atmosphere were similar enough to give her a pang of homesickness.

Anjali ruthlessly swallowed it down. After all, she could never go back to Rajipuri. Neither of them could ever go back. At least, Rajipuri was still there, still safe, still like it had always been. That was more than Mikhail could say for his homeworld.

So she decided to focus on the good things instead. For while she wasn’t sure whether the floating market really offered every good in the known universe, she had found some spice and tea merchants whose selection that could match what would be found on a Rajipuri market.

The food sold here was great as well. There was a bewildering variety of rice and noodle dishes, fried in big pans and inevitably tasty. Other stalls offered bits of tofu or fish or — if you wanted to go really luxurious — chicken stuck on skewers, grilled and served with a spicy peanut sauce. And finally, there was the full bounty of Sentosa’s world ocean, offered in the form of steamed spicy clams, crispy fried shrimps and fish, steamed or fried and coated in spicy chili sauce.

But the floating market had more to offer than weapons, spices and food. For Anjali had also come across some fabric vendors who offered an assortment of tantalising print fabrics with beautiful patterns in bright and cheerful colours. Apparently, fabric dyeing, printing and production was a traditional industry on Sentosa, though the gods alone knew where they found enough dry land to build the factories.

The fabrics were gorgeous, though. They’d make nice skirts or kurtas or maybe even a saree. Cause Anjali hadn’t worn a saree in way too long. Not that she had much opportunity, given their line of work and the fact that they were both on the run.

“You don’t need a new saree,” Anjali told herself firmly. Because those beautiful fabrics didn’t come cheap and money was tight, as it always was with them. And there were so many things they needed more urgently than pretty print fabric for a new saree.

A gust of wind blew across the market, tugging on Anjali’s long flowing skirt. The leaves of the trees that grew in the brackish water around the market rustled and the wind shook loose a plethora of pink and white blossoms, causing them to rain down onto the walkway. Anjali caught one in mid-air and sniffed its sweet, intoxicating scent.

“We’d best find shelter,” Mikhail said to her, “There’s a rainstorm coming.”

***

This story was available for free on this blog for one month only, but you can still read it in Mementos and Memories. And if you click on the First Monday Free Fiction tag, you can read this month’s free story.

 

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Cora’s Adventures at Metropol Con in Berlin, Part 2: The Con

As you probably know, I was at Metropol Con, a new SFF convention in Berlin, last week. For my pre-con wanderings around Berlin, check out this post. And now, let’s get to the con itself.

Day 1: Thursday, May 18, 2023:

Thursday, May 18, 2023, was a public holiday (Ascension Day) in Germany. It was also the first day of Metropol Con. I got up around half past eight and got dressed, including attaching my Hugo pins to my t-shirt. Then I had breakfast at one of the Turkish cafés in the area. There was a great Turkish bakery and café called Simit 24, operated by three generations of Turkish Berlin women (we jokingly called them “the new three ladies of the barbecue” after a popular 1980s German TV show about three generations of Berlin women operating a sausage stand), right across from the con venue.

Turkish breakfast

Turkish breakfast, courtesy of Café Simit 24.

After breakfast, I headed for Metropol Con. It was not a long trip, all I had to do was walk through a public park named after Max Josef Metzger, a Catholic priest executed by the Nazis who was the parish priest of the St. Joseph Church directly opposite the park.

St. Joseph Church in Berlin Wedding

The Catholic St. Joseph Church in the Wedding neighbourhood of Berlin, completed in 1909.

Ruin column in Berlin Wedding

The so-called Ruin Column in Max Josef Metzger Park in the Wedding neighbourhood of Berlin commemorates the rebuilding of Berlin after WWII. The column consist of rubble of bumbed out houses and businesses.

Chalk sign on the pavement

Just in case you missed Metropol Con, someone drew this chalk sign onto the pavement outside the venue.

The con was held at the silent green cultural center in the Wedding neighbourhood of Berlin. Now is probably as good a time as any to talk about the very unique con venue. Cause before it became a cultural center, silent green used to be a crematorium.

A sign points to Metropol Con

Another sign points towards Metropol Con.

There’s a detailed history of the crematorium on the website of the silent green cultural center. The short version is that cremation was considered controversial in Germany for religious reasons well into the 20th century. An atheist group lobbied to build a columbarium and mourning hall next to the Wedding cemetery. The columbarium and mourning hall were completed in 1909 and expanded with a crematorium in 1912. The crematorium was expanded several times since then, the last time in the 1990s, until it was shut down in 2002 and converted into cultural center and events venue. The result is a striking and ever so slightly morbid ensemble of buildings.

But see for yourself:

Silent Green cultural center seen through an archway

The former Wedding crematorium, now the silent green cultural center, seen through the entrance archway. Note the stylized flames on the gate.

Silent Green cultural center domed hall

The domed mourning hall and columbarium of the silent green cultural center with the chimney of the actual crematorium rising behind the building.

Domed Silent Green mourning hall seen through the gates

A closer look at the mourning hall and courtyard through the gates of the complex.

Silent Green gargoyles

Griffin gargoyles guard the gate to the mourning and columbarium.

Silent Green domed mourning hall.

The domed mourning hall of the silent green cultural center.

Female figure of the entrance of the mourning hall of the Silent Green cultural center

A female figure in a long robe adorns the entrance to the domed mourning hall of the silent green complex. The figure was kept deliberately neutral and might depict a Christian saint or a pagan goddess or a female mourner.

The mourning hall and columbarium complex is certainly an evocative and fascinating building and made for a great con venue.

Silent Green cultural viewed from gallery

Viewed from the walkway of the adjacent building, the silent green columbarium looks almost like a medieval castle.

Since my hotel was only about 350 meters from the con, I arrived fairly early, when the line at registration was only two people ahead of me. I also ran into the first people I knew before I even got the registration desk, which is always a sign that you’ll have a great con.

Silent Green cultural center with Metropol Con banner

The Metropol Con banner adorns the former administration building of the crematorium that has now been converted into panel rooms.

Since I’m the first and so far only German person to win a Hugo, I got several in person congratulations. I was also asked to sign things – a laptop, that was later auctioned off, two postcards and a book (not one of mine, but someone had everybody he met sign a book purchased in the dealers room). Of course, people also wanted to see the trophy – which of course was at home, because it weighs 4.5 kilograms – but luckily I had photos on my phone. Though I should probably find a better way to organise them, so I don’t have to scroll through umpteen unrelated photos to get to the Hugo.

Metropol Con badge with ribbons

My Metropol Con badge with ribbons and a Glasgow 2024 button.

Once I got my badge and wristband, I descended into the bowels of the silent green cultural center – quite literally, since much of the complex is underground, accessed via a ramp wide enough for a truck. It’s very practical and also easy enough to descend… at least until you remember what the ramp was originally for.

Ramp leading down into the bowels of the Silent Green cultural center

The ramp leading down into the bowels of the silent green cultural center.

At the bottom of the ramp, there was an area with notice boards, a freebie table and a giant Playmobil Mr. Spock who greeted con goers. The Mr. Spock figure was later auctioned off to help pay for the con.

Playmobil Mr. Spock

At the bottom of the ramp, this giant Playmobil Mr. Spock greets visitors.

Metropol Con notice boards

Notice boards with information about other upcoming cons. Dave Lally painstakingly set these up.

Notice board at Metropol Con

Another notice board with information about upcoming cons.

Beyond the notice boards and freebie tables, there was a subterranean bar called the “Betonbar” (concrete bar), because this part of the silent green cultural center is very much a concrete bunker. It would probably survive a nuclear strike and would also be an excellent place to hole up during the zombie apocalypse. Yet another level down was a large open space that was once used to store bodies and now served as the dealers room, exhibition space and gaming area.

Gaming and exhibition area at Metropol Con in Berlin

A look across the gaming and exhibition area at Metropol Con.

The exhibition space hosted a travelling exhibition about literature in East Germany as well as an exhibition dedicated to the late Austrian science fiction writer and computer art pioneer Herbert W. Franke.

Exhibition about East German literature at Metropol Con

“Leseland DDR” (Reading country GDR) is a travelling exhibition about literature in East Germany that was displayed at Metropol Con.

Science fiction section of the Leseland DDR exhibition.

The “Leseland DDR” exhibition had sections on various genres, including an extensive section about science fiction in East Germany.

Exhibition on East German science fiction at Metropol Con

More of the science fiction section of the exhibition about East German literature at Metropol Con. This exhibition just won the Kurd Laßwitz Preis.

Herbert W. Franke exhibition at Metropol Con

An exhibition dedicated to the pioneering computer artwork by Austrian science fiction writer and artist Herbert W. Franke.

Because it was still fairly early and there wasn’t a lot of programming yet, I took a stroll through the exhibition area and the dealers room. I chatted with people and also purchased yet more books, though once again I womanfully restricted myself to only two books. If you’ve been keeping count, means I had six books to take home now versus two books I’d bought to Metropol Con to donate to the auction.

I also bought a Metropol Con mug, which meant that I also had two mugs to take home now, since I’d bought a souvenir as a present for my Dad.

Metropol Con dealers room

A look across the vast dealers room at Metropol Con.

Metropol Con dealers room

Another look at the Metropol Con dealers room

Metropol Con dealers room

One last look at the Metropol Con dealers room.

Once I emerged from the catacombs of the silent green cultural center, I realised that I was lugging around two books and a mug, so I took them back to the hotel. Then I returned to the con, had a coffee and a chicken banh mi sandwich and attended a panel on science fiction in East Germany.

Now I do have a bit of experience with East German SF as a reader. Because when I was a kid, my Great-Aunt Metel, who lived in East Germany, would send me books and records for my birthday and Christmas, because books and records were fairly easily available in East Germany. Once she figured out I liked “space books”, she sent me science fiction books. Some of them were translated editions of East European authors like Stanislaw Lem and the Strugatsky brothers. Others were SF novels by East German authors. However, I don’t really have any systematic knowledge of East German SF, I just read whatever my aunt (or whoever went book shopping on her behalf, since Aunt Metel hardly ever left the house) could snag at the bookstore.

So in order to learn more about something I only have a cursory knowledge of, I not only bought a non-fiction book about East German science fiction in the dealers room, but also decided to attend a panel on the subject. The panelists were science fiction scholar Hans Frey, science fiction writer, critic and scholar Dietmar Dath, science fiction writer Emma Braslavsky (international readers may know her as the author of the story upon which the movie I’m Your Man was based) and science fiction writer Karlheinz Steinmüller, who co-wrote Andymon, voted the best East German science fiction novel of all time in 1989, with his wife Angela Steinmüller. Braslavsky and Steinmüller grew up in East Germany, Dath and Frey in West Germany. Below you can see my photo of the panelists, which isn’t very good. A better photo of the same panel by Roger Murmann is here.

Panel "Science Fiction in East Germany"

The panel on “Science fiction in East Germany” featuring – from left to right – Karlheinz Steinmüller (half hidden behind someone’s head), Emma Braslavsky, Dietmar Dath (also half-hidden behind someone’s head) and Hans Frey.

The panel was very interesting and went into what distinguished East German science fiction from West German and Western science fiction in general. One of the points made was that since East Germany has an official vision of what the future would look like, namely a Socialist utopia, the questions East German science fiction asked was not so much, “What will the future look like?”, because they already knew, but “How do we get there?” and “How do we do this?” The above-mentioned novel Andymon by Karlheinz and Angela Steinmüller is actually a good example for this, because it’s about some young people landing on a planet they’re supposed to colonise, only that the planet is not as advertised, so they have to figure out how to make it habitable anyway.

Emma Braslavsky pointed out that by the 1980s, when East Germany was visibly declining and falling apart (which tracks with what Aunt Metel told me, namely that East Germany continued improve and progress, albeit slowly, into the 1970s, then it stagnated and gradually fell apart), the Socialist Utopia was more of a promise, much like Christmas. Just sleep one more night and Christmas – Socialism is here and everything will be wonderful. Emma Braslavsky also noted that when she watched things like Star Trek on West German TV (a large part of East Germany could and did watch West German TV), someone muttered some complete nonsense like “Reverse the polarity” and it actually worked.

Even though the panelists grew up in two very different countries and systems, there were some things that united all of them. For example, it was never easy to be a budding SF fan in a small rural village or town, whether in East or West Germany, because library selections were limited and books or comics not always easily available in local shops. Karlheinz Steinmüller talked about what an important influence the Digedags from the Mosaik comics (I wrote a little bit about Mosaik and the Digedags in this Galactic Journey article) were on him and how the comics were often hard to come by, because they were hugely popular (due to being actually good) and quickly sold out. Karlheinz Steinmüller also talked about how he was eager to learn Russian (which was the first foreign language taught in East German schools), so he could read American science fiction writers like Isaac Asimov or Clifford D. Simak in Russian translation! Asimov or Simak were available in German, of course, but the translations were published in West Germany and therefore difficult to access for East Germans.

The panelists also discussed mistaken ideas and assumptions they had picked up from reading science fiction from an early age. One point made by both East and West German panelists was the assumption that religion would cease to matter and that the future would be largely atheist. I found myself nodding along to that point, because that was also very much my assumption. After all, in US science fiction of the so-called Golden and Silver Age, religion is either a scam (Foundation by Isaac Asimov, Gather Darkness by Fritz Leiber) or for aliens or both (The Gods of Mars by Edgar Rice Burroughs). Or it involves nubile beauties being sacrificed to some tentacled monstrosity. And in East European science fiction, the future was atheist for obvious reasons.

One assumption that I’m surprised no one brought up is that as a teenager I was absolutely certain that this whole Cold War nonsense would eventually stop – provided that the politicians didn’t manage to blow up the world first – because I’d seen Pavel Chekhov on the bridge of the Enterprise and Tamara Jagellowsk on the bridge of the Orion. Meanwhile, East Germans would have seen the American nuclear physicist Harringway Hawling defying the evil capitalists (TM) to travel to Venus aboard the Kosmokrator in The Silent Star. So I at least was totally convinced that this whole Cold War nonsense would eventually cease and we’d all go to space together – after all, I’d seen it happen on TV. And of course, I did see the Cold War end and the Iron Curtain fall as a teenager, only for both East and West to promptly put space exploration on the backburner. Because I had also never believed that the space race was a real thing – I assumed that “The Soviets or respectively Americans will get there before us” was just an excuse used to get funding from politicians who believed in that sort of nonsense and that the true reason to explore space was because space was cool. Yeah, joke’s on me.

After the panel, I hung out some more at the con. Then I returned to my hotel, rested a bit and went out for dinner. For some reason, there were several Korean restaurants within walking distance of the hotel and the con, so I headed for one of them and had a very tasty tofu bibimbap.

Tofu bibimbap

Tofu bibimbap

I returned to the hotel and went to bed fairly early by my standards, because my two panels were both on Friday, the first of them at 9:30 AM. And I did want to have a coffee and some breakfast before the panel.

Day 2: Friday, May 19, 2023:

The title of my first panel was “Translation: What is lost and what is gained”. One unexpected thing we lost was two panelists. German writer and translator Bernhard Kempen had a scheduling conflict and Czech writer and translator Julie Nováková fell ill just before the con. So we were down to three panelists, Claudia Rapp, C.D. Covington and myself. Luckily, Julie Nováková recommended a replacement panelist, Czech translator (she translated the first six of Laurell K. Hamilton’s Anita Blake books into Czech) and fantasy writer Lucie Luka?ovi?ová (I hope I managed to persuade WordPress to spell her name correctly, since WordPress hates carons), so we were four panelists after all.

We talked about false friends, translation pitfalls, accuracy versus poetic licence, what to do if there isn’t an equivalent in the target language, how to deal with quotes from religious and other texts and why machine translation can’t replace a human translator and often leads to nonsense such as translating brand names (a lot of webstores use machine translation, since they apparently believe that customers can’t make sense of English and want garbled nonsense) which a human would never do. I also shared my favourite example, the Masters of the Universe character Snout Spout (who is already pretty silly in general, because he’s a guy with an elephant head) which an overzealous translation program decided to turn into “Schnauzen Auslauf” for a German webstore.

I’ve done a lot of translation panels over the years, because I tend to get put on translation panels, even though I’m not a literary translator. Therefore, I have plenty of experience with translations panels and this was a really good one. The audience seems to have enjoyed it as well. At any rate, several audience members told us afterwards how much they enjoyed the panel. After the panel, the discussion also spilled out of the program room onto the walkway outside, which is always a sign for a good panel. The translation panel was recorded and someone took photos, but I can’t find either the recording or the photos online.

silent green cultural center program rooms and walkway.

The former administration building of the crematorium has been turned into program rooms connected by a walkway.

The translation panel ended at 10:30 AM and my next panel was at 12:30 PM, so I theoretically had two hours of time between panels. However – as mentioned above – we continued chatting after the translation panel, so the two hours were closer to one. I wanted to have lunch before the panel, so I headed to a Pakistani restaurant next to my hotel, which supposedly opened at 10 AM. Alas, it turned out that the sign on the door was inaccurate and the restaurant only opened at 10 AM on Sundays. On weekdays, it opened at twelve, which was a little tight for my taste. So I had a poga?a filled with feta and dill at a Turkish café instead.

My second panel was entitled “SFFH around the globe: developments, themes, trends” and took place in the great domed mourning hall. The other panelists were Metropol Con GoH Mary Robinette Kowal, Peter J. Maurits, a scholar specialising in African, specifically Mozambiquan literature, and Spanish horror writer Jesús Cañadas. The moderator was SFF writer Sabrina Železný. Once again, I hope that WordPress did not butcher Sabrina’s surname. And actually, this would have been a good subject for both the translation and world SFFH panel. Because how can it be that one of the most widely used blogging and content management systems keeps butchering East European names and words containing carons, even if you use the HTML character code workaround? There actually are photos of this panel, though none of them are mine for obvious reasons. You can see a few of them below, credited to the respective photographers.

The global SFFH panel also had a last minute panelist switch, because Ugandan SFF writer Dilman Dila, who was supposed to be on the panel, didn’t get a visa, so Jesús Cañadas took part in the panel instead. Unfortunately, this also led to a panel on world SFF with five white panelists, which is a less than ideal situation.

Global SFFH panel at Metropol Con

This isn’t my photo, obviously, but was taken by German science fiction writer Theresa Hannig and shared on Twitter. You can see the weird light in the domed hall, which turned everything and everybody purple. From left to right, we have Jesús Cañadas, Mary Robinette Kowal, Sabrina Zelezný, yours truly and Peter J. Maurits. Also note the gallery and the recesses originally intended for funeral urns, though they’re empty now.

The original tweet by Theresa Hannig is here BTW. Roger Murmann also took some great photos of this panel such as this one, this one or this one. Here’s also a great photo of me by Roger Murmann.

One aspect that we discussed was that SFFH from Africa, Asia, Latin America and the Middle East is a lot more visible now, because e-mail submissions, self-publishing, print on demand, webzines, etc… have made submissions more accessible and also given writers from all over the world the chance to publish their work, though there are still plenty of hurdles. Peter J. Maurits pointed out that African SFF is actually a huge field of different national literatures written in a variety of different languages and that his specialty is actually SFF from Mozambique, which is written in Portuguese. He also plugged Omenana as a free venue to check out English and French language SFF from Africa, while I noted that the anthology Africa Risen, edited by Sheree Renée Thomas, Zelda Knight and Oghenechovwe Donald Ekpeki, was available in the dealers room right there at the con.

Also, as the examples of Dilman Dila or Oghenechovwe Donald Ekpeki or almost every African SFF writer who wanted to attend the Dublin Worldcon in 2019 show, increasingly restrictive and – yes, racist – visa policies make in-person cons very difficult to access for writers from Africa, the Middle East, parts of Latin America and Asia, etc… This is also an issue that the SFF community can’t resolve on its own, because it’s part of the larger political issue of restrictive visa policies and the tendency to view any traveler from certain parts of the world primarily as a potential illegal immigrant or terrorist. Worse, writers, artists and musicians are often denied visa, because they often have no employer, are often young and have no partner or children and don’t fit into visa criteria for e.g. business travelers. Organisers of music festivals, art shows, theatre festivals, SFF conventions and any cultural event have been complaining for years now how difficult it is to get visa even for invited artists. However, less restrictive visa policies aren’t something that wins elections – quite the contrary, sadly, with all the panic about illegal immigrants and refugees – and usually not a political priority and there is little the SFF community can do about it. One thing we can do, however, is make sure that more cons have virtual components, virtual guests of honour, etc… Virtual cons exploded in popularity due to the covid pandemic and even though in person cons are great, we shouldn’t neglect the virtual elements, especially since virtual cons benefit not just people from non-western countries but all people who have problems participating due to disability, family commitments or jobs which make travel difficult, etc…

We also briefly got into the hostile reception that non-western Worldcon bids such as Chengdu or the bid for Jeddah in Saudi Arabia sadly still often get from the western and particularly American SFF community. This was partly in response to a question if Middle Eastern SFF might be the next to become more visible on the global stage. I pointed out that while the Jeddah bid wasn’t viable at the time, the treatment that the people behind that bid – fans like us – received was appalling. Referring the failed Jedi Con bid actually got me into a nice conversation with someone who translates Arabic SFF into English after the panel.

Furthermore, we also talked about the accessibility of writing workshops. Mary Robinette Kowal talked about the Writing Excuses cruises cum workshop and how the participants were still very white and very American, in spite of attempts to make them more accesible to people of colour via grants and to European participants by holding one during a Baltic cruise. However, cruises – and the reason the workshops are held on cruise ships is because the costs are actually lower than a residential workshop like Clarion or Viable Paradise would be, plus cruise ships are accessible for disabled people – have a certain reputation such as that they’re for white people or – particularly in Europe – they’re for old people.

On a more general note, we also discussed how science fiction, fantasy and horror are perceived in various countries – which is often still negatively – and also how that perception has changed over the years. Jesús Cañadas and Sabrina Železný had both been at the Leipzig Book Fair earlier this year, which had a special science fiction, fantasy and horror section… kept safely apart from the main Book Fair. I talked about how SFF was dismissed as “trivial literature” or outright trash literature, when I was a teenager – to lots of nodding in the auditorium, because I suspect every single German person in there probably hates the term “trivial literature” (which was and sometimes still is the official scholarly term for popular fiction in Germany) as much as I do. I also pointed out that things are changing and that e.g. Dietmar Dath (who actually may have been in the audience) actually made the longlist for the German Book Award a few years ago, as have other SFF works (most recently Theresia Enzensberger for At Sea in 2022), but that those books are usually considered to – another hated phrase, as we agreed – “transcend the genre”.

In general, it is notable that if you take a stroll to the dealers room at Metropol Con or check out a bookstore with a good SFF selection such Kulturkaufhaus Dussmann or an SFF specialty shop like Otherland, that there is a lot of German SFF, much of it published by small specialty presses. We also have a lot of younger German SFF authors in their 20s and 30s, including a lot of women, non-binary and LGBTQ authors, though SFF writer Alessandra Reß notes in her Metropol Con report that the membership skewed older, whiter and more male than the current German SFF scene. Nonetheless, the current situation is a far cry from the situation in the 1980s and 1990s, when I started reading and writing SFF and there was very little in the way of German SFF beyond Perry Rhodan, John Sinclair and Professor Zamorra as well as a few established, older male authors in West Germany and some SFF in East Germany. But the vast majority of what was available was British and American SFF in translation, which is also the reason I started to write in English – because there was no market in Germany at the time. And I pointed out that I probably would never have been nominated for, let alone won a Hugo, if I wasn’t writing in English.

I also mentioned German science fiction writer and Perry Rhodan co-creator Walter Ernsting, who had to invent a fictional American science fiction writer named Clark Dalton and pass himself off as the translator of Dalton’s works in order to get his own stories published. Walter Ernsting also came up in the translation panel BTW (he was a very prolific translator of golden and silver age science fiction) as an example of a translated title spoiling the plot of a story by Rosel George Brown.

Jesús Cañadas pointed out that there is a lot of speculative fiction and horror published in Spain and Latin America, but that very little of it is translated. And what is translated – Jesús specifically recommended Mariana Enriquez – is often not really packaged or marketed as science fiction, fantasy or horror. In general, many countries around the world have vibrant, active and fascinating SFF scenes – which are completely invisible to people from other parts of the world due to the translation gap and language barrier. Mary Robinette Kowal pointed out that trying to read a books in a foreign language would be an ethical application for machine translation in the absence of a translated edition, though official translations done by human translators are still preferable.

All in all, it was a great panel and I’m thrilled to have been a part of it. Directly after the World SFF panel, Mary Robinette Kowal held her keynote address about lady astronauts in fiction and reality in the great domed hall.

After the panel, I switched on my phone again to find that my Dad had tried to call me. He tends to call my around noon and the panel was at 12:30. However, a ringing phone on a panel is a distraction, so I switched it off. I talked to my Dad and got some coffee and a chocolate chip cookie.

Mary Robinette Kowal had finished her keynote address by now and we wound up chatting in the line at the Little Mars coffee shop in the former gatehouse of the crematorium and later at one of the tables set up outside the Little Mars. That turned into a rotating group of people chatting about all sorts of topics and actually made me miss the panel I wanted to see in the afternoon. Though I was later told that I didn’t miss much with regard to the panel.

Later that afternoon, I ran into German fan Peter Schmitt, who blogs about sword and sorcery and other topics at Skalpell und Katzenklaue and we wound up chatting for an hour or so, which unfortunately meant that I missed the other event I’d planned to attend that afternoon, too. That said, the conversations with people you just happen to meet are one of the best things about in person cons that hybrid and virtual cons can’t really emulate.

I left the silent green cultural center around 6 PM. By now, I was running a little low on cash, because the dealers room vendors as well as the cafés in the neighbourhood didn’t always accept cards. So I hopped into the subway and headed for Friedrichstraße station, because there is a branch of my bank on Friedrichstraße. Supposedly, there was at least one branch that was closer, but since I knew where the Friedrichstraße branch was, I went there. Since I was already in the neighbourhood, I took a brief detour to Gendarmenmarkt, which is one of Berlin’s most beautiful squares – flanked by two stunning and nigh identical baroque churches, one Lutheran and one for the French Huguenots who’d settled in Prussia escaping persecution in France.

Alas, Gendarmenmarkt is currently in the middle of a massive reconstruction project. The concert hall is hidden behind scaffolding and the entire square has been torn up and is cordoned off, though at least you can still access the German and the French church. I also managed to get a few nice photos.

Gendarmenmarkt German and French church

The German church at the Gendarmenmarkt in the foreground and the French church in the background. Neither church is still active and both of them house museums today.

French church on Gendarmenmarkt

A look at the French church on Gendarmenmarkt.

French church with con trail

The French church on Gendarmenmarkt with a strategically placed con trail behind the dome.

After that little detour to Gendarmenmarkt, I returned to the Wedding neighbourhood to have dinner. Of course, there are plenty of restaurants around Friedrichstraße and Gendarmenmarkt, but they’re also quite pricy, so I decided to have dinner in the Wedding area instead. I went to another Korean restaurant – there are several in the area – and had yet another bowl of bibimbap.

Day 3: Saturday, May 20, 2023:

On Saturday, I woke up fairly early, had breakfast and headed for the con once more. Since I had no panels of my own that day, I checked the schedule and decided to listen to German science fiction author Emma Braslavsky talk about her upcoming novel Erdling (Earthling), because I happen to like her work. International readers will probably know Emma Braslavsky best for writing the story “I’m Your Man” upon which the eponymous 2021 German science fiction movie is based.

Emma Braslavsky waves a phaser around at Metropol Con

Emma Braslavsky waves a phaser around during her presentation at Metropol Con.

Erdling sounds fascinating and I’ll probably get the book, when it comes out in November. However, the presentation also inadvertedly showed another issue of bringing German (or any other language) SFF to a global audience. Because a lot about the book is very German. Will audiences understand why it’s funny that leftist firebrand Sahra Wagenknecht has been abducted by aliens and that the protagonist, washed-up would-be private detective Emma Erdling, is recruited by Wagenknecht’s husband, leftist politician Oskar Lafontaine, to find her and embarks on a romp through time and space, accompanied by German weird fiction author Hanns Heinz Ewers. For a non-German audience, a translator would not only have to explain who Wagenknecht, Lafontaine, Ewers and a host of other characters are, but also the connotations these people have to a German audience. Because almost every German person will immediately have an image in their head, when they hear the names Sahra Wagenknecht or Oskar Lafontaine, and their minds will supply speculations what might happen if one of them were abducted by aliens. Will Sahra Wagenknecht lead the aliens to revolution? Or will she annoy them so much that they return her? A non-German reader simply doesn’t have those associations, unless they have followed German politics extremely closely.

Initially I was planning to attend an interview with Karen Nölle, who has translated Ursula K. Le Guin’s works into German, after the Emma Braslavsky presentation. However, towards the end of the previous program item, I suddenly got very tired. And because falling asleep on a panel is very rude, I decided to skip the Ursula K. Le Guin translation panel and get a coffee and a blueberry muffin instead.

Latte Macchiato and blueberry muffin

Enjoying a latte macchiato and blueberry muffin at the Little Mars café.

The next panel I attended was about dubbing movies and TV shows and how the process works. Now in Germany, every movie or TV show is dubbed into German. But while dubbing is ubiquitous, though in the age of streaming and DVD you increasingly have the option to watch the original version, with or without subtitles, I found that I know very little about how the process actually works. Therefore, I found this panel incredibly interesting. The presenter was Stefan Kaiser who is a dialogue director responsible for dubbing e.g. Wellington Paranormal or Parasite into German. And in fact, Stefan Kaiser used a scene from Wellington Paranormal as an example for how the dubbing process works.

Once again, the panel spilled out into the café area afterwards, where I realised that my phone showed ten missed calls from my Dad. As I said above, he tends to call me around noon, which was exactly when the panel took place. Though this time, I didn’t switch off my phone, because the dubbing panel took place in the so-called cinema, which was in the concrete reinforced bowels of the silent green complex, where there is no cell phone reception anyway. So I excused myself to talk to my Dad and then returned for a continuing of the dubbing industry.

Around three PM, I took a break from the con to go on an errand. I wanted to buy a comic, which had just come out that week, so I asked in the dealers room where to find a comic shop that carries all the latest US comics in Berlin. I was recommended Black Dog Comics in the Prenzlauer Berg neighbourhood, which turned out to be only two S-Bahn stations away. So I headed to Black Dog Comics, only to find that they didn’t have the comic I wanted, because since the pandemic they get new comics one week later than the US. That said, I still found something to buy and also had a nice chat with the owner. BTW, Black Dog Comics are curently running a 50 percent off sale on all Red Sonja comics to celebrate Red Sonja‘s fiftieth anniversary.

After my little excursion to Prenzlauer Berg, I headed back to the silent green cultural center, where the con was gradually winding down.

Metropol Con congoers emerging from the domed hall

Con goers emerge from the domed hall, where various items were auctioned off to support the con.

I bade good-bye to plenty of people, returned to my hotel and then went out for dinner. This time I had Pakistani food, namely vegetable pakora and chicken biryani, because my train home left the following day. I’ll probably do a part three about my post-con odyssey around Berlin on the first hot day of the year, where everything was either closed or overcrowded, while waiting for my train home to go at 4:38 PM, because that’s a different story.

All in all, I had a great time at Metropol Con and I’m glad that I attended. And even though I’m wholly in favour of virtual cons due to their accessibility, in person cons are another matter altogether. The Metropol Con website includes links to several other con reports – mostly in German, though this one by Wenzel Mehnert is in English – as well as videos and photo galleries.

The next Metropol Con is planned for 2026 and I’m looking forward to going, even if it means braving Deutsche Bahn again.

Finally, take a look at my Berlin trip haul, some of it purchased at the con and some in various shops around Berlin. And yes, I’m terrible at getting stuff signed, even if the author is right there in front of me. Largely, my problem was that the author was there in front of me, but the book was back at the hotel.

Metropol Con book haul.

My Metropol Con haul includes the first three issue of the Masterverse comic mini-series by Tim Seeley, Eddie Nunez and various other artists, The Red Scholar’s Wake by Aliette de Board, The Daughter of Doctor Moreau by Silvia Moreno-Garcia, Ghost Talkers by Mary Robinette Kowal, which I failed to get signed, Doomsday Morning by C.L. Moore, Tales of Nevéryon by Samuel R. Delany, the non-fiction book Vision und Verfall: Science Fiction in der DDR by Hans Frey, which I also failed to get signed, a presenter gift in the form of cute candy and two mugs.

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Indie Speculative Fiction of the Month for May 2023

Indie Speculative Fiction of the Month
It’s that time of the month again, time for “Indie Speculative Fiction of the Month”.

So what is “Indie Speculative Fiction of the Month”? It’s a round-up of speculative fiction by indie and small press authors newly published this month, though some April books I missed the last time around snuck in as well. The books are arranged in alphabetical order by author. So far, most links only go to Amazon.com, though I may add other retailers for future editions.

Once again, we have new releases covering the whole broad spectrum of speculative fiction. This month, we have epic fantasy, YA fantasy, sword and sorcery, paranormal romance, paranormal mystery, science fiction mystery, science fantasy, space opera, military science fiction, dystopian fiction, weird western, horror, space colonisation, time travel, space fleets, lost colonies, wizards, ghosts, barbarians, temporal fugitives, haunted houses, crime-busting witches and much more.

Don’t forget that Indie Speculative Fiction of the Month is also crossposted to the Speculative Fiction Showcase, a group blog run by Jessica Rydill and myself, which features new release spotlights, guest posts, interviews and link round-ups regarding all things speculative fiction several times per week.

As always, I know the authors at least vaguely, but I haven’t read all of the books, so Caveat emptor.

And now on to the books without further ado:

Into the Void by Jonathanh P. Brazee and J.N. ChaneyInto the Void by Jonathan P. Brazee and J.N. Chaney:

The Exile Fleet has been decimated, but the mission must go on.

What other choice do they have? With most of the officers KIA, Sergeant Major Reverent Pelletier has to step up to lead the ground force.

Meanwhile, the remaining ships ply the far reaches on unexplored space to identify potential threats to humanity.

And as the saying goes, if you search for trouble, trouble will often find you.

With peace at home beginning to break down, the Exile Fleet is on its own as it tries to fulfill its mission. . . and not get killed in the process.

Join Rev, Tomiko and the rest as they forge an unprecedented path into the vast unknown.

Legacy of Seven by P.J. FlieLegacy of Seven by P.J. Flie:

A world filled with magic, wizards, enchanted beings … and a construction robot?

The mystical world that has risen out of the ashes of science and technology could soon fall.

While the young wizard Ondreeal has her magic safely under control for now, she is plagued with dreams of a nightmarish future that she can’t recall upon waking, dreams that leave her unsettled all the same. A nagging urgency pulls her back to Bastion—a free city of light and a beacon of hope for all peoples.

There, Sir Francis, the wise wizard of the north, will have the answers that she so desperately needs. But if she returns too late, her mentor may fall into the hands of the dark wizard Zairoc, and Ondreeal will forever lose the only one who can unravel the mystery of her past, and help her to become a true wizard of light.

That would also keep robot CD-45 from completing his mission. He carries a dire warning of an ancient threat that looms in orbit above the planet—a message that only Sir Francis can comprehend.

For good or ill, Ondreeal’s fate will be the fate of the world.

Sea of Mist by Rachel FordSea of Mist by Rachel Ford:

Knight Protector Portia Daysen and Captain Valia Iceborn may have rescued the legendary black wyvern hatchling from one peril, but the struggle for his freedom – and their lives – is just beginning.

The route to safety lies across the perilous Sea of Mists. But those treacherous waters can only be navigated by moonlight.

With a Northern knight and a Southern inquisitor on their tails, each hellbent on revenge, the pair is running out of time and options.

But there are worse things than their pursuers lurking in the Sea of Mists…

Gunslingers of the Toxic Age by Theodore GideGunslingers of the Toxic Age by Theodore Gide:

Kristen Black, PI, reluctantly agrees to investigate the murder of a young political activist. Kristen doesn’t want the job — political crimes tend to conceal other, more lethal crimes. The deeper Kristen penetrates into the dark shadows of a broken city during wartime, the more deadly the pushback against her becomes. As Kristen feared, unmasking the killer opens a pandora’s box of violence and she’s on the run from the long arm of Military Security, chemical plants around the world are being bombed and her gun is pointed dead center at the man she loves.

 

Imaginary Friends by Lily Harper HartImaginary Friends by Lily Harper Hart:

When it comes to magic, Rowan Gray-Davenport has always been grateful to be part of the club. She never wanted to be the leader of it, though.
All of that is about to change.

When Rowan’s friends Sally and Demarcus arrive on their new purchase, a vintage steamboat they want to refurbish so they can turn it into a floating restaurant and casino, Rowan and her husband Quinn are thrilled to reunite with them. That only lasts until their daughter Lana asks about the invisible children on the boat. It seems there are a lot of them, and they just might be dead.

It appears the new boat is haunted, and the ghosts are looking for vengeance. They seem to have their sights set on Lana as a form of protection. She just doesn’t know it yet.

Lana is a little girl who wants to be seen as special. Unfortunately, she can’t see the danger that’s directly in front of her. Rowan can, however, and it doesn’t take long for her to call on her friends Ivy, Harper, and Maddie to get her through this ordeal.

The children might have been innocent when they died, but they’re out for blood now. It’s going to take the whole gang working together to see this through to the other side.

Lana’s life is hanging in the balance, and this time the magic that’s required to save her will stem from her mother’s love. Rowan had better be up to the challenge, because otherwise her family will be lost.

Her moment is here. She has no choice but to embrace it.

Kwelengsen Swarm by David M. KellyKwelengsen Swarm by David M. Kelly:

How long can one man keep fighting?

Logan’s dreams of a peaceful life on Kwelengsen have been shattered. A final battle with the Corporate forces seems inevitable and will cost all the settlers’ lives unless he can get them off planet. But with deadly new species appearing all around, the remaining survivors find themselves battling enemies on multiple fronts.

And when the settlers start behaving in strange, inexplicable ways, Logan must fight to uncover the reasons behind their sinister death wish. But with Corporate reinforcements on the way, he’s fast running out of time.

Kwelengsen Swarm–the endgame is survival, but who is the enemy?

Dial W for Witch by Amanda M. LeeDial W for Witch by Amanda M. Lee:

The Happy Holidays Players—a renowned acting troupe—is coming to town and Hemlock Cove is bursting with excited residents who want parts in the winter festival. That includes the three Winchester matriarchs, who are vying with one another for top billing.

Bay Winchester doesn’t care about the pageant, but she’s more than happy to sit back and watch the shenanigans. That is until her husband Landon Michaels calls with a request for her help. It seems there was a prison break twenty minutes away … and more than a handful of inmates are on the run.

Bay, Landon, and Hemlock Cove Police Chief Terry Davenport make up their own search party. What becomes apparent fairly quickly, however, is that some of the inmates are magically enhanced. By whom, though?

Each subsequent battle results in a tougher takedown, and as Bay delves deeper into the mystery of a guard who may have helped the fleeing inmates, she finds herself entrenched in a fight to the death.

Bay and Landon are looking forward to their first holiday season as a married couple. They’re desperate for some downtime and holiday cheer. To get it, they’re going to have to survive a magical onslaught that seems to be pointed at their family more and more with each passing day.

Bay might be able to call the dead to battle for her, but this is a war between the living … and both sides are going to go down fighting.

Here comes trouble. There’s no going back.

Tempus Fugitive by J.S. MorinTempus Fugitive: Mission 1 by J.S. Morin:

The next generation is here, and trouble is in their DNA.

Jessie and Eric Ramsey have a family history of crime. Fighting back against heredity, each tried to make their way in the galaxy by respectable means. Jessie joined Earth Navy; Eric went to college for magic. But fate wasn’t having it. Eric was expelled. Jessie went AWOL. Now, due to a magical mishap that wasn’t entirely anyone’s fault (we swear!), they’re stranded 5 years in the future on a Mars that’s no longer friendly territory.

Caught behind enemy lines in a galactic civil war they didn’t know about, the pair need every trick in their respective books to survive on Mars long enough to escape. Along the way, they’ll meet old friends and make new foes, and if they’re very lucky, manage to figure out where they belong in this new galactic order.

And Mars is only the beginning. Time travel is a one-way trip, and the only way to stop is death. And Ramseys don’t die easy.

Sons of Sorrow by Nazri NoorSons of Sorrow by Nazri Noor:

The Tears of the Ocean. The Heart of the Flame.

Lochlann Wilde is preparing for his final challenge: entering the Oriel of Fire, the most dangerous of the elemental dimensions. Acquiring the essence of fire will score him another powerful guardian, as well as complete Aphrodite’s amulet.

But the world outside the oriel has its own challenges. Sylvain has discovered something difficult about his heritage. Aphrodite keeps dropping unsettling hints about Locke’s true nature, too.

Most pressing of all is the mystery of the parchment that cursed Queen Aurelia to begin with, the only clue that may lead to the truth about the Withering. Who is behind it? Why did they engineer the plague?

And how can Locke and Sylvain stop them from infecting the cosmos?

The Headless Boy by Kelli OwenThe Headless Boy by Kelli Owen:

A novel similar to suspenseful classics like The Haunting of Hill House, The Woman in Black, and Bag of Bones.

Reeling from the loss of a child, Maggie finds her job at the local daycare unbearable and errands around town impossible. She knows every child, every single parent, and they’re all reminders of what she’s lost. Unable to heal, she sinks further into the grip of grief and depression.

Jake is a good guy, a great husband, and wants only the best for his broken wife. Therapy and medications aren’t helping, and a change of scenery makes perfect sense. A new home. A fresh start. He is nothing but patient, giving Maggie the space and emotional support needed to move on.

But once they’ve settled in, Maggie offers him an alternative. And though Jake doesn’t believe in ghosts, he plays along with the charade in the name of helping his wife. Until he discovers it’s not a game.

They are not alone.

As the subtle activity grows violent, Jakes realizes the thing in their house has chosen Maggie as a surrogate mother, and it does not want a father figure. Jake and Maggie’s fresh start has become a battlefield, and he’s no longer sure which side his wife is on.

Does Jake have the strength to save them both?

The Haunting of Blackstone Mansion by Augustine PierceThe Haunting of Blackstone Mansion by Augustine Pierce:

An abandoned mansion. A restless spirit. A terrible secret…

Seeking to escape a recent tragedy, antiques expert Katherine relocates to Blackstone, Oregon. Her new home lies within reach of the majestic Mt. Hood, and tucked away in the thick forest of those foothills looms the dark, foreboding, and abandoned Blackstone mansion.

 

 

Tales of the Wold by Yazar QuintTales of the Wild by Yazar Quint:

Barbarian life is brutal but full of wonder.

Banished from her tribe, Rexa wanders the world, exploring ancient ruins, discovering great wonders, and facing terrible monsters. She has no home but the wild. No gods to guide her. Brazen and reckless, she carves her path with a sharp tongue and steel in hand, fighting for the right to see another sunrise.

Laws of men have no power beyond the stone walls of cities and castles. In cursed forests, treacherous mountains, and dreadful deserts, bravery thrives and weakness withers. It is a world where reality does not play by its own rules—a world of mystery and sorcery. The wild challenges Rexa’s very understanding of life as she deals with matters of immortality, forgotten kingdoms, incomprehensible magic, monstrous humans, and human monsters.

Though she is a crude outsider by nature, Rexa leaves her mark on many lives across two continents. Queens, witches, and warriors tempt her with guile, magic, and courage. Some succeed, if only for a little while. Rexa’s heart belongs to the wild. She is a barbarian, unbeholden to civilization. While death is ever eager to claim her, she can’t resist the wicked wonders of the world.

Tales of the Wild is a journey of sixteen stories set in a harsh realm of sword and sorcery, where it takes a barbarian to survive—let alone thrive. Dive into Rexa’s world as she suffers curses of time, encounters beings of unfathomable origin, faces the trials of hidden tribes, and delves into the remnants of a dwarven kingdom.

Desire by Morgan RiceDesire by Morgan Rice:

Mistfalls Wilderness Camp is an awful place, a series of islands in the rainy Northwest, populated by delinquents and outcasts from their families. It is supposed to be a remedial place—but Taylor soon learns something else is happening here. They are training the kids here for something. But what?

These kids are all different, not normal somehow. And as Taylor herself goes through changes she doesn’t understand, she can’t help but wonder: is she different, too?

But when she finds herself having a crush on a mysterious boy, Taylor realizes he is not what he seems—and that her own destiny may be far greater than she imagined.

But will their forbidden love take them both down for good?

The Forgotten Colony by J.B. RyderThe Forgotten Colony by J.B. Ryder:

Zach Croft wants to forget the Prescott colony ever happened.

He wants to forget the crimson sand dunes, violent dust storms, and meteor impacts. He wants to forget the sight of his neighbors bleeding from their eyes as boils ravaged their bodies. He wants to forget the fact that his best friend was left to die. Most of all, he wants to forget that, without Prescott, humanity is doomed.

But when a Prescott dropship plummets from the sky twenty-three years later, he has no choice but to remember.

As Zach embarks on a life-or-death quest for answers about the dropship’s impossible return, he discovers something even more important: there is still hope for humanity’s survival.

With conditions rapidly worsening on Earth, he is in a race against time to return to Mars, finish the work that Prescott started, and save the human race from extinction. To do so, he must face the truth about what really happened in Prescott—a truth that calls into question everything he thinks he knows about who he is, who he trusts, and what he has done.

Blood Adept by Glynn StewartBlood Adept by Glynn Stewart:

From the genre-blending master Glynn Stewart, author of Starship’s Mage, comes the latest in his thrilling fantasy Western series, set in a new world with a magical twist…

Hard rides and long nights as a cattle hand prepared Teer for the harsh life of a bounty hunter on the Unity’s eastern frontier. His fate now tied to the disguised El-Spehari demigod Kard, his quick eye and steady shooting hand have kept them both alive—even when the bounty hunters decided justice required taking a fugitive beyond the reach of the Unity’s law.

The same law would see Teer himself doomed for the magical powers now awakening within him. He has followed Kard to a strange shaman who promises to train him—but when a monster turns on and slaughters an entire hunting party, Teer and Kard take up the hunt to protect friend and foe alike.

Their hunt follows the monster to the edge of the Unity, where the Spehari lords have sent an entire regiment to bring the monster down. But teeth and claws are the least of the dangers the creature brings to bear—and the monster itself is only one of many dangers Teer and Kard face as they walk among enemies to protect the innocent…

Prodigal by Glynn StewartProdigal by Glynn Stewart:

The star system of Apollo has fallen!
Her fleets are scattered and her enemies victorious.
Apollo’s last hope: an exile mercenary coming home at last!

Ace pilot Kira Demirci fled her home system of Apollo five years ago. Betrayed by her own government and one step ahead of enemy assassins, she smuggled a squadron of star fighters into the Outer Rim and forged a mercenary fleet of old friends and new alike.

Many of the aces of Apollo’s war against Brisingr weren’t as lucky.

Kira has a new home, but a scheme hatched by her enemies has brought her to the edge of her old stomping grounds. This close to Apollo, she’s one of the first to hear the devastating news: Brisingr has achieved its ultimate victory and captured her home. To take a star system should be impossible, but the reality is clear.

With family, friends and old comrades in the hands of the Brisingr Kaiserreich, Kira mobilizes her mercenary fleet to seek out the scattered remains of Apollo’s fleets and allies.

Even if she can manage the merely difficult and bring the broken factions together, the hard truth remains: Brisingr’s victory was impossible. To undo it, Kira will have to duplicate it…

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Indie Crime Fiction of the Month for May 2023


Welcome to the latest edition of “Indie Crime Fiction of the Month”.

So what is “Indie Crime Fiction of the Month”? It’s a round-up of crime fiction by indie authors newly published this month, though some April books I missed the last time around snuck in as well. The books are arranged in alphabetical order by author. So far, most links only go to Amazon.com, though I may add other retailers for future editions.

Our new releases cover the broad spectrum of crime fiction. We have hardboiled mysteries, cozy mysteries, small town mysteries, historical mysteries, Victorian mysteries, Jazz Age mysteries, 1940s mysteries, paranormal mysteries, humorous mysteries, crime thrillers, legal thrillers, psychological thrillers, action thrillers, suspense, noir, police officers, FBI agents, private investigators, amateur sleuths, lawyers, serial killers, the Mob, missing persons,  kidnappings, heists, crypto currencies, faked deaths, crime-busting witches, crime-busting socialites, deadly helicopters,  murder and mayhem in London, New York, San Francisco, Florida, Ohio, Yorkshire, the Mediterranean and much more.

Don’t forget that Indie Crime Fiction of the Month is also crossposted to the Indie Crime Scene, a group blog which features new release spotlights, guest posts, interviews and link round-ups regarding all things crime fiction several times per week.

As always, I know the authors at least vaguely, but I haven’t read all of the books, so Caveat emptor.

And now on to the books without further ado:

Death Beyond Forbidding Gates by Blythe BakerDeath Beyond Forbidding Gates by Blythe Baker:

The long expected death of Victoria Sedgewick’s father-in-law draws Victoria back to the family’s Yorkshire estate one final time. But what should have been a simple funeral turns dangerous as Victoria finds herself the victim of a set of eerie circumstances. Although the locals talk of a ghost that haunts Sedgewick widows, Victoria suspects the true villain is all too human — and is targeting her infant son.

Reuniting with Branwell Keats, can Victoria protect her family through one last adventure that will finally reveal the truth behind the secrets that have cast a shadow for so long?

Call Thee Devil by Beth ByersCall Thee Devil by Beth Byers:

Smith and Bea are back in London, and Smith might well be back to his old ways. Bea’s instincts are screaming, and Smith is disappearing. Something is certainly amiss, and he doesn’t want her meddling.

He really should know better.

 

 

 

Without a Trace by Stacy ClaflinWithout a Trace by Stacy Claflin:

How many secrets can one gated community hide?

Ariana and Damon have just started to rebuild their lives when more bones are found in their tight-knit neighborhood. These have nothing to do with the remains found earlier.

That means one thing — another killer is roaming free.

The police are investigating, but Ariana’s friend Maya has discovered startling clues that she can’t tell them. But when Ariana’s own family is in crisis, she can’t worry about what might be unraveling all around them… until the mystery proves too much to ignore and the only way to peace is to find answers.

A neighbor is lying about something. Ariana must hurry to get to the bottom of it before another life ends up on the line. And it could be hers.

Gunslingers of the Toxic Age by Theodore GideGunslingers of the Toxic Age by Theodore Gide:

Kristen Black, PI, reluctantly agrees to investigate the murder of a young political activist. Kristen doesn’t want the job — political crimes tend to conceal other, more lethal crimes. The deeper Kristen penetrates into the dark shadows of a broken city during wartime, the more deadly the pushback against her becomes. As Kristen feared, unmasking the killer opens a pandora’s box of violence and she’s on the run from the long arm of Military Security, chemical plants around the world are being bombed and her gun is pointed dead center at the man she loves.

 

Against the Clock by Mark Allan Gunnels, Shane Nelson and Brandon FordAgainst the Clock by Mark Allan Gunnells, Shane Nelson and Brandon Ford:

Three suspenseful mystery novellas with a dark edge…

Septic by Mark Allan Gunnells: The year is 1988. When Carl finds himself trapped in a school bathroom with a faulty lock over Christmas break, things seem bad. When the pain in his abdomen increases and he realizes his appendix has burst, things get worse. Can he manage to free himself in time?

Subscription Due by Shane Nelson: Rupert Seville is living an idyllic life. A successful writer married to an amazing woman, everything seems to have fallen into place. But when a strange notice arrives in the mail, Rupert’s idyllic world is turned upside down. It is a “Subscription Due” notice for a magazine to which he’s never subscribed. Beneath the surface, it is far more than that and the arrival of two violent men with murder on their minds only makes it clearer. Rupert doesn’t know it, but the amount he owes is far more than he’s able to pay. The past itself has come due, and Rupert has no idea of the terror about to be unleashed. When the world he thinks he knows begins to unravel and the truth of the past catches up to him, it is up to Rupert Seville to find a way to settle old debts and escape a horror that isn’t of this world.

Pixelated by Brandon Ford: After the passing of his grandfather, Tanner returns to his hometown to clean out the property willed to him. However, what he finds holds the key to an unsolved crime decades-old and shows just how little he knew of his former father figure.

This novella anthology is perfect for fans of mystery and suspense books, thrillers, small town mysteries, unsolved crimes, and a bit of horror.

Proudly represented by Crystal Lake Publishing—Tales from the Darkest Depths.

Imaginary Friends by Lily Harper HartImaginary Friends by Lily Harper Hart:

When it comes to magic, Rowan Gray-Davenport has always been grateful to be part of the club. She never wanted to be the leader of it, though.

All of that is about to change.

When Rowan’s friends Sally and Demarcus arrive on their new purchase, a vintage steamboat they want to refurbish so they can turn it into a floating restaurant and casino, Rowan and her husband Quinn are thrilled to reunite with them. That only lasts until their daughter Lana asks about the invisible children on the boat. It seems there are a lot of them, and they just might be dead.

It appears the new boat is haunted, and the ghosts are looking for vengeance. They seem to have their sights set on Lana as a form of protection. She just doesn’t know it yet.

Lana is a little girl who wants to be seen as special. Unfortunately, she can’t see the danger that’s directly in front of her. Rowan can, however, and it doesn’t take long for her to call on her friends Ivy, Harper, and Maddie to get her through this ordeal.

The children might have been innocent when they died, but they’re out for blood now. It’s going to take the whole gang working together to see this through to the other side.

Lana’s life is hanging in the balance, and this time the magic that’s required to save her will stem from her mother’s love. Rowan had better be up to the challenge, because otherwise her family will be lost.

Her moment is here. She has no choice but to embrace it.

Hotshot Shamus by Heather HavenHotshot Shamus by Heather Haven:

THE AD SAID, PERSEPHONE COLE, HOTSHOT
INVESTIGATOR: INVESTIGATE THIS!

A witness says a large redheaded woman wearing a fedora had an argument with the victim. A fedora was found at the scene.

And its owner could be only one person— hotshot P.I. Persephone (Percy) Cole–because it’s 1943 and how many nearly six-foot, red-haired fedora-fancying female P.I.s could possibly prowl the streets of New York? All the cops know Percy.

She’s one of a kind, both in1940s New York, and also in all of crime fiction. For openers, she’s a single mom living with her adored son Oliver and her parents, each of whom is their own kind of hoot. Pantsuits haven’t yet been invented, so Percy wears men’s suits that her mom alters to fit her: “A seam let out, a seam taken in, and they fit the five foot eleven, one hundred- and eighty-two-pound Percy perfectly.”

(Mom’s an inventive cook too— cranberry and ketchup fish stew is one of her specialties.)

Percy finds out about the case when she sees her name in the personals column: “Persephone Cole, Hotshot Investigator. Investigate this: Wilma Markovich, fifty-eight years old, widow.”

She knows right away she’s being set up, and no sooner has she grasped the particulars than another personals ad appears:

“Still think you’re a hotshot detective, Percy Cole? I don’t think so. And soon everyone else will know you’re not. Check out Elizabeth Wallingford, age fifty-seven, Manhattan.”

Okay, this is war! And she acquires a powerful weapon to fight it—she gets hired to find the first victim’s killer and soon notices a pattern– it seems each murder has a disturbing connection to The Cloisters Museum.

Disturbing because so does Percy—her mom’s producing a fashion show there on Mother’s Day, and her whole family will be there.

Dial W for Witch by Amanda M. LeeDial W for Witch by Amanda M. Lee:

The Happy Holidays Players—a renowned acting troupe—is coming to town and Hemlock Cove is bursting with excited residents who want parts in the winter festival. That includes the three Winchester matriarchs, who are vying with one another for top billing.

Bay Winchester doesn’t care about the pageant, but she’s more than happy to sit back and watch the shenanigans. That is until her husband Landon Michaels calls with a request for her help. It seems there was a prison break twenty minutes away … and more than a handful of inmates are on the run.

Bay, Landon, and Hemlock Cove Police Chief Terry Davenport make up their own search party. What becomes apparent fairly quickly, however, is that some of the inmates are magically enhanced. By whom, though?

Each subsequent battle results in a tougher takedown, and as Bay delves deeper into the mystery of a guard who may have helped the fleeing inmates, she finds herself entrenched in a fight to the death.

Bay and Landon are looking forward to their first holiday season as a married couple. They’re desperate for some downtime and holiday cheer. To get it, they’re going to have to survive a magical onslaught that seems to be pointed at their family more and more with each passing day.

Bay might be able to call the dead to battle for her, but this is a war between the living … and both sides are going to go down fighting.

Here comes trouble. There’s no going back.

Medusa and the Devil by Simon MarloweMedusa and the Devil by Simon Marlowe:

‘The Devil plays games, that’s all I can tell you.’

Steven Mason is six feet under. The only problem? He’s not dead.

After escaping from the doom and gloom of low-life gangsterism on a rundown Essex housing estate, Steven had hoped to pursue a new life in the Mediterranean. But his former world of corruption and greed is not so easily set aside, and he is drawn into yet another nefarious job.

Now, trapped with no means of escape, he is left to ponder why he keeps being drawn closer and closer to Hell.

Too Pretty To Die by Willow RoseToo Pretty To Die by Willow Rose:

Inspired by a true story.

Four women went on a weekend of fun to Miami.
Four best friends who were inseparable.
No one returned.

The story made national headlines, and even after weeks of searching for them, they were never found.
What happened to them?

Are they still alive?

Three years later, the teenage children of those same four women decide to take a trip together, against the wishes of their families. They are followed by a TV crew doing a true crime show. They’re returning to Miami to find out what happened to their mothers.

When they unearth the body of one of their mothers, they know they are in way over their heads, and soon they realize nothing is what it seems, as this vicious killer is getting ready to chase them down.
FBI profiler Eva Rae Thomas is called in to help, bringing her old flame Matt to help.

Soon, she realizes she is hunting down a serial killer unlike any other she has encountered, who will next come after someone she loves.

Fastrope by L.T. and Fiona RyanFastrope by L.T. and Fiona Ryan:

Hatch closed a major chapter in her life. Drifting between everywhere and nowhere, she seeks to find her new path. Like any pathfinder, Hatch cuts through the pain of her past one step at a time.

A desperate call from an old friend brings her to Florida’s panhandle. Before Hatch can connect, tragedy strikes. A helicopter training accident off the shore of Naval Air Station Pensacola takes the life of her friend and seasoned operator. All she has to go on is the cryptic message, leaving her with more questions than answers.

When the pieces of the puzzle don’t fit, Hatch must satisfy her own curiosity. There are some who don’t want the truth to be exposed and will do everything in their power to stop it from coming to the surface.

As Hatch turns every stone, she slips deeper into dark territory. Surrounded by enemies. Hatch must deploy the skills that have made her legend.

Follow Hatch down the Fastrope and prepare for yourselves for the hell she brings upon those who force her to once again honor the code instilled by her father. Protect those who can’t protect themselves and punish those responsible.

Somewhere in a Dark Wood by Shane SawyerSomewhere in a Dark Wood by Shane Sawyer:

A quiet country road
A desperate search
A missing man
A promise

At an isolated farmhouse, Edie Doyle stumbles upon a gravely injured man. Suddenly she’s neck deep in trouble—again.

When the man begs for help, she can’t refuse, but how can she keep her promise when he disappears before she even learns his name?

The police don’t believe her, the surly farmer doesn’t want her help, and the only witness isn’t talking. Can she find the missing man before it’s too late, and before anyone else gets hurt?

Her search will take her beyond the sun-drenched fields into dark woods—and even darker shadows—but Edie will keep her promise.

Unless someone stops her first.

Dead Coin by Sheldon SiegelDead Coin by Sheldon Siegel:

Deal Coin is dead. So is Tyson Gore — the crypto company’s rockstar CEO.

Homeless addict Reggie Jones stands accused of his murder during a botched robbery in the heart of Salesforce Park.

San Francisco Public Defenders Mike Daley and Rosie Fernandez race against time to uncover the truth.

From gleaming office towers to powerful venture capital firms on Sandhill Road to tawdry strip clubs catering to Silicon Valley’s elite, they follow a trail of betrayal, greed, and corruption.

DEAD COIN is a story of San Francisco. It’s a tale of hope and greed, innovation and speculation, progress and decline. It’s a story that’s still being written.

Murder at Madame Tussaud's by Lee StraussMurder at Madame Tussaud’s by Lee Strauss:

Murder’s a pain in the neck!

Madame Tussauds, London’s extravagant wax museum, reopens in 1928 to much fanfare. The horrific fire of ’25, which had destroyed the wax figurines of famous and sometimes infamous characters, was news of the past. Ginger Reed and her good friend Haley Higgins are intrigued and eager to visit the museum which promises new and exciting exhibits. Of particular interest is the one on Bram Stoker’s Dracula.

Hailed by some as effective literary horror and by others as unnecessarily frightening, the exhibition about the book attracts all kinds. Haley Higgins, with her forensics knowledge, is the first to notice that something is amiss, and that the beautiful figurine with two bloody holes in her neck isn’t made of wax at all, but is indeed made of flesh and bone!

When a series of women are found dead in the streets of London in a similarly eerie fashion, it’s up to Scotland Yard, with Chief Inspector Basil Reed at the helm, to solve the case. Can Ginger and Haley work behind the scenes to bring this repeat killer to a stop, before one of them becomes the next victim with a deadly bite?

Full Tilt Boogie by Robb T. WhiteFull-Tilt Boogie by Robb T. White:

Something’s going on in Youngstown, Ohio—and it isn’t pretty. Newly assigned to the field office, Special Agent Jade Hui is stumped by her predecessor’s do-nothing record when there’s every indication something big is going to happen. An Aryan Brotherhood convict tells her a new designer drug from Europe is about to hit the streets of the Midwest and Youngstown will be the launching pad. Next, a female prizefighter winds up dead in a dumpster behind a bar with a shady reputation. That’s only the beginning of what turns out to be, in cop slang, a full-tilt boogie with Youngstown becoming one big crime scene.

Before it’s over, Jade will find herself in combat with some extremely disturbing characters, including a dubious former Hollywood filmmaker, his two thugs—all three employees of the most sinister character of all, one who goes by the name ”the emissary.” This someone is far deadlier than anyone she ever worked a case against in the “Little Odessa” of Brighton Beach in her last posting.

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Cora’s Adventures at Metropol Con in Berlin, Part 1: Pre-Con Wanderings

As you probably know, I was at Metropol Con, a new SFF convention in Berlin, last week. And I had a great time overall and met lots of old and new friends, though there were a few hiccups along the way.

I encountered the first hiccup as soon as I was seated in the ICE train from Bremen to Hannover. Because as I was waiting for the train to depart, the public address system announced that there was a powerline failure between Bremen and Hannover and that the train would be delayed by twenty minutes. And because my connection time in Hannover was only about twenty minutes that meant there was a high chance that I might miss my connecting train in Hannover. In the end, I did catch my connecting train to Berlin, because it turned out that the Berlin train was delayed as well, so the delays cancelled each other out.

That said, it was very kind of Deutsche Bahn to remind me why I don’t use them all that much. Because Deutsche Bahn has a lot of issues. The trains are beset by delays and there was a massive fifty hour strike planned for Monday and Tuesday, i.e. the day before I was due to travel to Berlin, which was only cancelled at the last minute, after plenty of people had already changed their travel plans. What is more, I had booked tickets for the ICE high speed train for my trip to Berlin. However, on the Bremen to Hannover route, the super-fast ICE train (the fastest they ever went was 406 kilometres per hour and they go over 300 kilometres per hour on regular journeys) used the same tracks as the regional train and trundled through all the small town stations like Achim, Baden, Verden on Aller, Nienburg, Neustadt am Rübenberge, etc… and traveled at the same speed as the regular regional train would. The only difference was that the ICE didn’t stop at the various small town stations, whereas the regional train would. Still, why did I pay the premium for the ICE again, when it’s not actually any faster than the regional train? And in fact, I had been considering getting a 49 EUR per month Germany-wide public transport ticket to get to Berlin, which is good for public transport and regional trains, but decided to go with the ICE, because it’s faster and requires fewer train changes. And indeed, on the longer Hannover to Berlin route, the ICE actually did go 352 kilometres per hour.

In the end, I arrived in Berlin only a few minutes later than I normally would have, because the train driver apparently made good time on the Hannover to Berlin route. However, the next challenge awaited me once I reached Berlin, because the layout of Berlin’s newish multi-level central station is very confusing – worse than the old East and West Berlin central stations it replaced – and while there were maps for regional train networks, I had a hard time finding either a map or a signage for the city public transport network.

In many ways I was reminded of one of my first visits to Berlin in the spring of 1990, when the Wall was already open, but East Germany still existed as a state. At the time, we decided to walk from the Victory column in (West) Berlin to the Brandenburg Gate. Because the Wall and the Gate were open, we just walked through and had our passports stamped by the friendliest East German border guard I’ve ever seen and just kept walking into East Berlin, walking along famous streets and buildings we knew existed, but had never actually seen, until we reached Alexanderplatz (BTW, I tried to walk that memorable route again from the other side and gave up halfway through, because it’s a very long walk and I’m no longer 16), got tired and decided to take the train back to West Berlin. So we went to Friedrichstraße station and looked at the network plan on the platform, only to find a huge gray hole where West Berlin should be. So I went to a train attendant and told him, “We need to go back to West Berlin to Uhlandstraße station [at any rate, I think it was Uhlandstraße], but West Berlin doesn’t exist on your map, so which train do I need to take?” The East Berlin train attendant apologised for the maps – they hadn’t gotten around to replacing them yet – and told me which train to take.

Friedrichstraße railway station

Friedrichstraße railway station, looking still very much like it did in 1989.

Palace of Tears

The so-called Palace of Tears, the former transit hall of the Friedrichstraße station border checkpoint. The reason for the name is that a lot of tears were shed here, as people said goodbye to their loved ones from the other part of Germany. Nowadays, it’s a museum.

My difficulties at finding a public transport map or even signage where the public transport trains were led me to grumble, “Thirty-three years later and a brand-new central station and you still haven’t put up a bloody public transport map.” I finally did find the public transport platform and had another surprise, because the S-Bahn trains (regional above-ground trains in Berlin and other German cities) still looked very much like they had thirty plus years ago. Friedrichsstraße station, where I had to change from the S-Bahn to a subway train also still looked very much like it did back in 1990 (and probably way before), though the extensive passport control area (Friedrichstraße station was also a border crossing point) has been replaced with shops and fast food restaurants. The station also still didn’t have escalators, so I was extra careful, because I had sprained my ankle lugging a suitcase up and down the many stairs at Friedrichsstraße station during my first visit to Berlin about a month before the fall of the Wall. This time, I did make it into the subway without injury. Now the Berlin subway isn’t nearly as deep as the London tube, but it is still weird that there are comparatively few escalators.

Kurt Schumacher Haus in Berlin Wedding

The Kurt Schumacher Haus, headquarters of the Berlin chapter of the Social Democratic Party of Germany. My hotel is the building directly behind the Kurt Schumacher Haus.

My hotel was in the Wedding neighbourhood near the con venue and was hidden behind Kurt Schumacher Hause, the Berlin city office of the Social Democratic Party SPD (built in 1961). The SPD signage was a lot more prominent than the hotel signage, so I almost missed it. Wedding used to be a traditional working class neighbourhood of Berlin and was part of West Berlin from 1945 to 1990. Nowadays it’s an immigrant neighbourhood dominated mainly by people of Turkish and Middle Eastern origin. The hotel itself was okay for a budget hotel and the fact that it was so near to the con venue was definitely a plus.

Hotel room window view

The view from my hotel room window at a typical Berlin apartment block. On the ground floor of the apartment block is a so-called “Späti”, an all-night shop. In the background, you can see the unemployment office for the Wedding neighbourhood.

Once I got to the hotel, my room wasn’t ready yet, so I dumped off my suitcase and went exploring. I had deliberately planned to arrive on the day before the con, so I would have time to see a bit of Berlin. The first thing I did was – guess what? – hit the bookstores. Well, the interesting ones, that is, because Berlin has a lot of bookshops.

Memorial plaque at the Friedrichstraße railway viaduct.

Memorial plaque at the Friedrichstraße railway viaduct. The inscription reads: “Shortly before the end of the criminal Hitler war, two young German soldiers were hanged here by dehumanised SS-bandits.” The plaque is located right next to the entrance of a modern McDonald’s which is extremely incongruous.

So I made my way back to Friedrichstraße station. I made a little detour, because I took the wrong exit and suddenly spotted the distinctive signage atop of the Theater am Schiffbauerdamm, home of Bertolt Brecht and the Berliner Ensemble on the far side of the river Spree. So I walked over the nearest bridge to take some photos.

Berliner Ensemble

The Theater am Schiffbauerdamm, home of Bertolt Brecht and the Berliner Ensemble. Plays like The Three-Penny Opera, Mother Courage or The Rise and Fall of the City of Mahagonny had their premieres here.

Bertolt Brecht statue

The man himself: Statue of Bertolt Brecht in front of the Theater am Schiffbauerdamm

After this little detour, my first stop was Kulturkaufhaus Dussmann (literally “cultural department store Dussmann”), Germany’s biggest book and media store. The store has five floors of books, CDs, DVDs, magazines, stationery, etc… and is located in a prominent location on Friedrichstraße in the city centre. It has an interesting backstory, too, because founder Peter Dussmann was the son of booksellers. He eventually founded a company which offers facility management, cleaning services, security services, etc… and became one of Germany’s wealthiest people. But he never lost his love for bookselling and when his company built a new corporate headquarters in Berlin in 1997, he also added the five floor bookstore.

Kulturkaufhaus Dussmann courtyard

Five floors of books, CDs and DVDs at Kulturkaufhaus Dussmann.

Kulturkaufhaus Dussmann courtyard

Kulturkaufhaus Dussmann truly is heaven for book lovers.

Kulturkaufhaus Dussmann is a great store with a huge English language section, which is divided by genre. They even had a table for modern gothic fiction, which I found very prescient, since we seem to be seeing something of a gothic revival going on at the moment. Much as I enjoyed browsing, I womanfully limited myself to buying only two books. Dussmann have even got a sphinx – a real sphinx that dates back to 1495 BC and is on loan from the nearby Egyptian museum.

Sphinx in Kulturkaufhaus Dussmann

A genuine sphinx graces the lobby of Kulturkaufhaus Dussmann.

By now it was around noon and I hadn’t eaten anything since a yoghurt at six in the morning, so I had lunch (a salmon poke bowl) in one of the many hipster restaurants around Friedrichstraße. I also caught my only glimpse of Berlin’s newest tourist attraction, the anti-climate-change activists calling themselves the Last Generation, who are mostly notable for the tendency to glue themselves to streets and to pour paint and other liquids on artworks and luxury shops. Now I happen to think that the Last Generation folks are idiots, who are certainly not helping the cause they claim to serve. But based on media coverage, I had expected that you couldn’t take a step in Berlin without stumbling over a Last Generation activist. And apparently they were protesting and blocking roads somewhere in the city, while I was there. However, I only saw a small cluster of activists on Friedrichstraße, holding up a banner. I was a bit confused, because that part of Friedrichstraße is a pedestrian zone, so if you want to block motorised traffic, that’s about the worst place in the city to do it. However, it turned out that the activists were picketing the office of the Deutsche Bank on Friedrichstraße. Which I actually don’t mind, because they weren’t actively stopping anybody from going anywhere, though if you wanted to go into the bank (I didn’t), you had to walk around them and listen to their shouting. And besides, Deutsche Bank very likely had it coming.

Last Generation activists on Friedrichstraße in Berlin

Last Generation actvists picketing the Deutsche Bank branch on Friedrichstraße in Berlin. You can also see how unimpressive the pedestrian portion of Friedrichstraße actually looks.

Regarding the pedestrian zone in part of Friedrichstraße, this is actually a huge battle in Berlin at the moment, big enough that the rest of Germany is aware of it. After actually seeing the pedestrianised part of Friedrichstraße, the whole thing seems like a lot ado about very little. For starts, they only turned a few hundred meters of Friedrichstraße into a pedestrian zone – most of the (pretty long) street is still open to motorised traffic. And while I don’t think turning Friedrichstraße or part of it into a pedestrian zone is a bad idea per se, the execution doesn’t work IMO. Because the pedestrianised part of Friedrichstraße is basically a canyon flanked by mostly post-1990 office and commercial buildings some seven or eight stories tall. Several of those buildings are banks or offices or otherwise not really of great interest to average passer-by. A large part of the street is taken up by a brutalist slab of concrete that houses a Russian cultural center, a legacy of old East Berlin. There are some high-end shops, but no cafés or restaurants. In short, it’s not a particularly pleasant stretch of road – in fact, the still motorised parts of Friedrichstraße are much nicer with many beautiful nineteenth century buildings and cafés and restaurants. They did dump a few artsy looking benches onto the street, but there are no planters or trees to provide shade and the sun glared down onto the tarmac.  So in short, you can sit down, which is nice, but it’s not a very pleasant place to sit. And since they only banished cars, but not bicycles, you are also at risk of having a bicycle run over your foot. Finally, the whole experiment is extremely expensive, costing approx. 213000 Euros per year. Having seen how unimpressive it actually looks, that’s an enormous waste of money.

After lunch, I returned to the hotel, because my room was finally ready. Then, after a brief rest, I headed out again. This time, my destination was the Kreuzberg neighbourhood, famous for being both an immigrant neighbourhood as well as hippest neighbourhood in (West) Berlin in the 1970s and 1980s. Kreuzberg is also notable, because its inhabitants resisted the destruction of Victorian neighbourhoods in favour of Brutalist apartment blocks in the 1960s and 1970s and thus changed city planning in (West) Germany for everybody’s benefit.

Passion Church in Berlin Kreuzberg

The Passion church in the Kreuzberg neighbourhood of Berlin, built in 1908.

My destination was Otherland, a great SFF specialty bookstore in the Kreuzberg neighbourhood. Once more, I womanfully restricted myself to buying only two books and also explored the area, while I was there. I found a comic shop, which alas did not have the comic I was looking for, and an extensive indoor market. There was a great spice and herb shop at that indoor market, but they didn’t have filé powder a.k.a. sassafras leaves, which are nigh impossible to get in Germany.

By that point, I was finished with what I absolutely wanted to do and yet it was still early in the afternoon. So I decided to do some tourism and revisit sights I hadn’t seen in many years. I made my way back to the crossing of Friedrichstraße and the famous boulevard Unter den Linden and strolled down Unter den Linden in western direction towards the Brandenburg Gate.

Unter den Linden

A look down Unter den Linden in easterly direction. You can see the German national library, the TV Tower and the tower of the Red Townhall in the distance. The boulevard itself is still leafy and pretty, but somewhat boring and far from bustling.

The first time I was there in the summer of 1990 (Unter den Linden was in East Berlin), I thought Unter den Linden was something of a disappointment and a far cry from the famous boulevard that even has a song by Walter Kollo dedicated to it (sung here by Harald Juhnke). Because unlike the bustling boulevard from the song, where young men stroll along to pick up women, the actual Unter den Linden was wide street lined by lots of embassies, ministeries and other official buildings. There were almost no shops, restaurants and cafés in those days, just big, old and rather grimy buildings with lots of colums. Nowadays, all of the big old buildings have been cleaned up and restored and there also are a few shops, mostly souvenir shops, and cafés, but the street itself is still quite boring. The bustling and lively Unter den Linden that Walter Kollo describes in his song must have died sometime in 1945, if not before. Though interestingly, I did walk the exact same stretch of Unter den Linden that Kollo mentions in the song – from the crossing of Unter den Linden and Friedrichstraße, site of the long since defunct and destroyed Café Bauer, to Pariser Platz, the area in front of the Brandenburg Gate – which is as long as it took Kollo’s protagonist to pick up a woman. I did not, however, try to pick up anybody of any gender.

Brandenburg Gate

The Brandenburg Gate viewed from the Eastern side. Once upon a time, this was where the world ended, quite literally.

Brandenburg Gate western view

The Brandenburg Gate, viewed from the western side. This was the only way you could see it up to 1989, though the lower portion was walled up.

Reichstag

The Reichstag, seat of the German parliament. The original building was complete in 1894, burned in 1933 and lost its original dome, was further damaged in WWII and refurbished several times. The current glass dome was added in the 1990s and designed by Norman Foster.

Rainbow flag over the Reichstag

The rainbow flag is flying over one of the turrets of the Reichstag building, which made me very happy.

I walked through the Brandenburg Gate and paid a visit to the Reichstag, home to the German parliament. A rainbow flag was flying on one of the turrets of the Reichstag, which made me happy. I briefly considered walking onwards to the Victory Column, but it’s a long way and my feet were beginning to hurt. So I got on the subway (I had a day pass) and headed back in the opposite direction to pay a visit to the Red Townhall (so called, because it’s built from red bricks), Berlin’s townhall and one of my favourite buildings in the city. At university, I even wrote a paper about the Red Townhall, though I don’t remember all that much about it.

Red Townhall

The so-called Red Townhall, seat of the mayor and magistrate of the City of Berlin. Designed by Hermann Friedrich Waesemann and completed in 1869.

The Red Townhall is still a stunning building and in the immediate neighbourhood, there’s also the beautiful Neptune fountain and St. Mary’s, the oldest still active church in central Berlin (the nearby St. Nikolai Church is older, but has been a museum since the 1930s). Because by European standards, most of central Berlin isn’t actually very old. Apart from St. Mary’s and St. Nikolai, the oldest buildings in the city center date from the early 18th century, i.e. they’re about three hundred years old. Most of the pre-1700 neighbourhoods and buildings in the city fell victim either to various city planning and remodelling attempts over the centuries or to WWII.

Neptune fountain and St. Mary's church

The beautiful Neptune fountain, created in 1891, and St. Mary’s, Berlin’s oldest active church in the background. The oldest parts of St. Mary’s date from the 13th century, the current tower was added in 1666.

Looming above the Red Townhall, St. Mary’s and the Neptune fountain is the Berlin TV Tower, completed in 1969 and still Germany’s tallest building. And yes, Germany’s tallest building stands in what used to be in East Berlin, which must have annoyed West German architects to no end. The TV Tower is one of Berlin’s most famous and reconisable sights and while I’ve seen it from the ground several times before, I’ve never actually been up on the observation platform nor in the rotating café and restaurant inside the sphere section. I briefly considered buying a ticket for observation deck, but wasn’t willing to pay 22.50 EUR or wait an hour for the privilege of looking down on Berlin from above.

Berlin TV Tower

The Berlin TV Tower, completed in 1969 and still Germany’s highest building. Note the cross-shaped reflection in the sphere. People used to say that this was God giving the East German communists the middle finger by hiding a secret cross in their showpiece tower.

So I trotted past the TV Tower towards Alexanderplatz. The first time I saw Alexanderplatz in 1990, I found it a huge disappointment, because it’s basically just a huge windswept expanse of concrete surrounded by modernist buildings that certainly did not live up to its legendary reputation as the heart of the bustling Weimar era Berlin. BTW, if you’ve seen Babylon Berlin, which has a lot of scenes set on and around Alexanderplatz, it hasn’t looked like that since 1945 and the Alexanderplatz scenes are actually CGI mixed with close-up shots of buildings which look kind of similar to what would have been there in 1929/1930. For example, the close-up shots of Berlin’s long gone central police headquarters on Alexanderplatz are actually the Red Townhall, because both buildings had red brick facades. It’s still very obvious to me, because the Red Townhall is very recognisable, even close-up.

Alexanderplatz has changed quite a bit since 1990, though not necessarily for the better. They’ve just added a few more large buildings which house department stores, shopping malls, a cinema and the like and covered up some of the East German murals with advertising. Besides, the World Time Clock was edging towards 6 PM, so I decided to go back to my hotel. Though I did buy a mug from a souvenir shop as a present for my Dad first. My Dad is one of those people who are notoriously hard to shop for, but he drinks coffee, so I usually buy him a souvenir mug. I found a nice one with a cartoony drawing Trabant car breaking through the Berlin Wall.

Trabant outside a souvenir shop

A Trabant car, once sought after and now decorating a souvenir shop on Alexanderplatz.

Back at the hotel, I rested for half an hour or so and then headed back out for dinner. I found a great dumpling restaurant very close to the hotel and had a combination platter of assorted dumplings, a tofu bao bun and fries with hoisin sauce.

Dumplins, tofu bao bun and fries

My dinner, consisting of dumplings, a tofu bao bun and fries with hoisin sauce, all courtesy of Han West House of Dumplings.

After dinner, I headed back to the hotel, checked my e-mails and went to bed, ready for Metropol Con to begin the next day.

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