Death threats for reviewers, sexed-up classics, judging books by their covers and a dead German singer

We’ve all heard about the Stop the Goodreads Bullies uproar by now (I’m not dignifying that site with a link – google it if you must). And now a film critic has received death threats – for daring to give a bad review to The Dark Knight Rises, which ruined that film’s perfect score at Rotten Tomatoes.

Now I hardly ever visit Rotten Tomatoes, since the site only reflects the tastes of the average American movie goer. If you’re not American, the scores are flat-out useless, because – believe it or not – tastes differ between different countries. But even if you put stock in Rotten Tomatoes, it was just a bad review for a movie that would make loads of money even if all reviews were bad. Besides, you have to wonder about people who use Batman quotes – even quotes from the creepy and inhuman Batman of the Christopher Nolan films (not a fan at all) – to threaten an innocent person. Do they really think Batman would approve? Batman of all superheroes?

Say it ain’t so: An enterprising publisher has decided to cash in on the increased visibility of erotica by issuing new editions of various classic novels such as Pride and Prejudice or Jane Eyre with added sex scenes. Really, why can’t whoever wanted to see what Elizabeth and Darcy or Jane and Rochester were up to in bed either use his imagination or read any number of historical romance novels with plenty of sexual content? Why must they deface timeless classics by writers who cannot even defend themselves against this sort of thing? Really, and I thought the zombie mash-ups were bad.

This is why I’m angry about the popularity of Fifty Shades of Grey (expect another post on that in the next few days). Not so much because of the books themselves, even though I have massive issues with the gender and relationship dynamics in the series, as explained before, because in the end Fifty Shades of Grey is just a trilogy is books I don’t like. However, since the damned things are so successful, all sorts of people try to cash in on the popularity of Fifty Shades of Grey, which leads to travesties like those eroticized classics or a flood of erotic romance novels with stone age gender relationships and heroes who should be in therapy or prison rather than anywhere near any living women. And so far we have only seen the quickie cash-ins. The real flood is yet to come and hell only knows how long it will last. After all, the romance genre took almost fifteen years to recover from the legacy of The Flame and the Flower and Sweet Savage Love.

This is hilarious. A six-year-old girl gives her summaries of various literary classics and not so classics – based on the book covers. In some cases, the little girl’s version sounds more interesting than the actual book. I mean who wouldn’t want to read the version of The Great Gatsby set in a haunted amusement park.

Museumscheck, a summer series at the German-Swiss-Austrian cultural TV channel 3sat, visited the German emigration museum at Bremerhaven yesterday. A very good documentary and virtual tour of the museum. The whole program is online here. The other installments about notable museums in Germany, Austria and Switzerland are well worth watching as well.

German singer Norbert “Bert” Berger died of pneumonia aged only 66. In the 1970s, Norbert Berger and his then wife had a string of hits – mostly typically sappy Schlager fare – as the singing duo Cindy and Bert. They even went up against ABBA at the Eurovision Song Contest – and promptly placed last. Their son Sascha also became a pop singer. And here is, in memory of Bert Berger, the IMO best song by Cindy and Bert (probably because it was originally by Black Sabbath), Der Hund von Baskerville (The hound of Baskerville) in psychedelic groove-o-vision. For something more typical of their output, try Spaniens Gitarren (Spanish guitars) from 1974 or Wenn die Rosen erblühen in Malaga (When roses bloom in Malaga) from 1975. Imagine the sheer horror of growing up in a world where the vast majority of music on TV and on the radio is like that.

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More New Pulp and Ron Moore does Outlander

Over at the Pegasus Pulp blog, I take a further at the current discussion about the New Pulp Fiction and try to define for myself where I stand on this.

In other news, it was announced today that Ron Moore is supposed to adapt Diana Gabaldon’s Outlander saga into a TV series.

With the success of True Blood and Game of Thrones, it seems that American cable TV channels have discovered the fantasy genre as a fertile hunting ground for properties to turn into TV series. And Outlander is pretty much the ideal candidate, since it has a rabid fanbase (though it’s almost all female), can be adapted fairly easily, won’t break the bank and has enough sex and violence (and rape and gay sex and gay rape) to satisfy the gritty tastes of American cable television viewers. It’s certainly a more logical candidate than Game of Thrones with its secondary world setting (albeit one that’s fairly close to 14th century England) and cast of thousands.

Now I’m not a huge Outlander fan. I read and enjoyed the first book, but I never felt the urge to read the rest of the series and actually prefer the Lord John Grey books. Nor am I a rabid Jamie Fraser fan – indeed, I never quite forgave him for the spanking scene halfway through the first book. If a series were made, I’d probably give it a try, but I don’t really have any strong feelings either way.

However, I do have very strong feelings about Ron Moore. In fact, he’s still in my personal top five of “people I can’t fucking stand”. Because you see, I was a big fan of the original Battlestar Galactica. When I was a teenager in the 1980s, the original Battlestar Galactica was one of the very few examples of post Star Wars SF or of SF period to ever show up on German TV. Sure, it wasn’t Star Wars, but the chances of ever getting to see Star Wars before I was old enough to have my own flat and buy a VCR and buy or rent it on video were slim anyway. And Battlestar Galactica was the next best thing to Star Wars there was. Besides, it had Richard Hatch on whom I had a huge crush at the time. And I could persuade my Mom to watch it, because it had Lorne Greene and Terry Carter on whom my Mom had something of a crush. So yeah, I’m very fond of the original Battlestar Galactica.

When the new series was announced I was highly skeptical and I grew ever more skeptical the more information we got from the US. Starbuck and Boomer are women now? The guy who played the police chief in Miami Vice was the new Adama? Cylons looked human now? In short, it sounded like the worst series ever and when I actually got to watch it, once it made it to German TV, it managed to exceed my worst expectations. Because Ron Moore had turned what used to be a decent space opera with likable characters and episodes ranging from the stupid to the pretty damn brilliant, took out almost everything that made the original good and turned out into a thinly veiled analogy of US politics that was not very interesting, if you happened to live outside the US and happened to prefer your SF with a little less overt politics. And let’s not even mention the endless discussions about philosophy and religion, which were designed to feel “deep” to a particular kind of fan (I argued with that kind of fan. A lot). Even worse, Moore turned the characters that I had loved into murders, rapists and worse.

So in short, I hate what Ron Moore did to Battlestar Galactica and I never liked Deep Space Nine in the first place. What Ron Moore excels in is the sort of grimdark faux grit that a certain kind of fanboy loves, because it feels deep and realistic to them, though it’s really just nasty and often deeply sexist (in the new Galactica, women had only three stories: They could get raped, get pregnant or get breast cancer). What will happen when Ron Moore gets his hand on Outlander, which unlike the original Galactica actually does have plenty of violence, rape and problematic gender issues? I shudder to imagine and I’m not even an Outlander fan.

Meanwhile, the actual Outlander fans are worried, too, though more about the casting than about Mr Moore’s contribution. Those worries are justified, because an Outlander cast filled with Americans attempting bad Scottish accents would indeed be a disaster. As would be casting name actors, just because they are names.

Indeed, some Outlander fans have posted an open letter to Sony and Ron Moore at My Outlander Purgatory, asking them to do right by Jamie Fraser.

I certainly hope he does better by Outlander than he did by Battlestar Galactica.

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Pegasus Pulp e-books now available at Kobo

Canadian e-book retailer Kobo finally opened its Writing Life portal to the public today, which means that you can now buy all of my e-books at Kobo as well.

So if you own a Kobo e-reader, want to avoid the Amazon international surcharge or need another place to buy in epub format, check it out.

Here is the link to all my books. Individual links can be found at the respective book pages.

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Short Sunday Morning Post

Some kind of pollen seems to be flying around that does not agree with my hayfever at all, besides half the Internet seems to be in San Diego for Comic Con this weekend, so here’s just a short post for this Sunday:

My post about the New Pulp Fiction over at the Pegasus Pulp blog got quite a bit of attention on Twitter and Facebook, so head over and read it, if you haven’t already.

In other news, my official write-up of the launch reading for newleaf 28 as well as my write-up for last year’s Summer Session reading is up on the official newleaf website.

While on the subject of newleaf, the second crime novel by newleaf author Elke Marion Weiss, Die ungewisse Reise nach Samarkand (The uncertain journey to Samarkand), came out a few days ago. There’s a Kindle edition as well, which is not always common for German language fiction yet.

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School is Out Linkdump

Today was the last day of school in Lower Saxony where I teach, which means six weeks (sort of) without school. And it’s about time, since we hit a late slot with our summer holidays this year, which meant that this school year seemed to drag on and on.

Now I have more time, I hope to write many detailed and well reasoned blog posts in the future. But for now, have a few links:

Over at the Pegasus Pulp blog, I blog about The New Pulp Fiction.

Lynn Viehl at Paperback Writer has a great post about building characters according to the LEGO principle.

At Time, Andrea Sachs writes about the rise of the cowboy romance novel. Now the appeal of the cowboy romance is something I absolutely don’t get, probably because any cowboy hero has to overcome the negative associations with the word “cowboy” that Hollywood westerns have left in my mind. Ditto for military romances. If you come from a culture where “soldier” and “military” have negative associations, military romances are not easy to digest. Though I still like Suzanne Brockmann’s Navy SEAL romances a lot.

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New Release: Under the Knout

It seems that I’m really on a roll here, for barely a week after the last one, I have another new old story available. It’s called Under the Knout and is the second to last of the stories I wrote for Man’s Story 2.

Under the KnoutRussia during the reign of Catherine the Great: The sisters Natasha and Irina had been born serfs, property to the wealthy lords, destined to be worked to death on the fields. Yet Natasha and Irina had been lucky, for their talent at dancing caught the eye of the powerful Countess Rashkova, who made the girls part of her personal ballet company, to dance for the delectation of the wealthy and the powerful.
But life is dangerous in the ballet company of the Countess Rashkova, for even the slightest misstep is punished most harshly. And so Natasha and Irina find themselves thrown into a rat-infested cell deep beneath the elegant Palais Rashkov in St. Petersburg. But the dungeon is only the beginning, for the sadistic Countess Rashkova and her pet, the torturer Dimitri, are about to subject Natasha and Irina to the knout, that fiendish Russian whip whose caress was once considered a death sentence.

Warning: There is quite a bit of violence in this story, so sensitive readers should tread carefully.

For more information, visit the dedicated Under the Knout page.

Buy it for the low price of 0.99 USD, EUR or GBP at Amazon US, Amazon UK, Amazon Germany, Amazon France, Amazon Spain, Amazon Italy, Kobo, DriveThruFiction, OmniLit/AllRomance ebooks and XinXii.

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Appliance Trouble Linkdump

I haven’t been blogging for the past few days, because I had some appliance trouble at home that limited by internet time. This will take a few more days to resolve, so blogging should be light over the next week at least. On the plus side, I’ll have a new e-book to announce tomorrow.

And now for some links:

This year’s Ingeborg Bachmann award goes to Russian German writer Olga Martynova. The winning text may be read (in various languages even) on the official Bachmann prize website as well.

I wrote a bit about the Ingeborg Bachmann prize, which is awarded after what is basically a public and televised writing workshop critiquing session, last year. What is more, I also blogged about spotting a Kindle in the hand of one of the readers at this year’s Bachmann prize over at the Pegasus Pulp blog.

Pornokitsch interviews Jane Rogers whose novel The Testament of Jessie Lamb managed to unusual feat of both landing on the Booker Prize longlist and winning the Arthur C. Clarke award earlier this year.

Here is an older, but very worthwhile post: At Trac Changes, Rachel Stark dissects the troubling trend towards having dead looking girls on the covers of paranormal YA fiction. There’s also a follow-up post with links to reactions by other bloggers here. I have to say that I hate the current trends for YA covers. The dead girls are the worst of it, but the waif-like girls in evening gowns who are not quite dead yet (since they are still standing), but look as if they will soon be, are annoying as well, especially since every second YA novel has such covers. Indie writers are even worse. In the past few weeks, I have seen at least four indie YA writers change unique and interesting covers to generic waif-like or dead girl covers, because they believe that those covers will sell more books.

At the Book View Café, Sherwood Smith has a great post about stealing ideas and the various ways to do it today.

SF Signal‘s latest Mind Meld asks whether space opera has lost its luster and whether the popularity of Steampunk is to blame. My answer to the question (not that anyone asked me) would be “Yes, it has” and “No, it’s not Steampunk, it was those singularity folks”.

Still Eating Oranges points out why “plot requires conflict” is a western notion. Found via Jay Lake. I’d add that the overemphasis of “conflict” is not merely a western, but particularly an Anglo-American idea, since Germans don’t harp on about the importance of conflict nearly as much as Americans do. Ditto for the emphasis on agency, which is another thing that Americans insist on, whereas you rarely to never hear it in the rest of the world. Aliette de Bodard makes a similar point in this post from last year.

The discussion about Fifty Shades of Grey is still going on. At the Guardian, Vanessa Thorpe wonders why British women are turned on by Fifty Shades of Grey. Apparently, Fifty Shades of Grey is both the fastest selling paperback and bestselling e-book ever in the UK. So much for my idea that this particular book spoke mainly to Americans and that it won’t be as successful elsewhere.

Talking of erotic fiction, at Terrible Minds Chuck Wendig has 25 tips for writing about sex.

At The Atlantic, Scott Meslow wonders whether people who dislike Aaron Sorkin’s work are simply too stupid to grasp the wonderfulness that is Aaron Sorkin, as Sorkin fans tend to claim. As someone who disliked Aaron Sorkin’s work intensely before I ever learned his name I have never seen anything wonderful about his scripts, hence I’m always a tad pleased whenever something of his fails like that Studio 66 on Sunset thing. Indeed, the most charitable thing I can say about Sorkin and his work is that he is “too American” for my tastes.

There’s also been a couple of notable deaths in the past few days:

American actor Ernest Borgnine, whose career literally spanned sixty years from From Here to Eternity to Spongebob Squarepants, died aged 95. As a child of the 1980s, I mainly associate Ernest Borgnine with his roles in Airwolf (which I loved as a kid, but cannot watch anymore) and Escape from New York.

American actor Andy Griffiths died Tuesday at age 86. Again, I’m probably showing my age here, since to me Andy Griffith was Matlock, the Southern lawyer of the white hair and white suit and rather dull show that even back in the 1980s, when any American show was a rare treat, was considered “for parents and old people”. I don’t think I ever saw The Andy Griffith Show at all. It probably never made it to our shores, because it was deemed “too American”, never mind that the whole folksy small town thing did not match the image that Germans wanted to have of the US, which is basically big, glittery and rich. Though come to think of it, we did get a few of the folksy shows, since I remember watching The Waltons, Little House on the Prairie and The Life and Times of Grizzly Adams in the 1970s and have particularly fond memories of Tammy, the Southern girl living on a houseboat with two elderly relatives. Interestingly enough, neither Tammy nor Grizzly Adams were particularly popular in the US itself, though they both were big hits on German TV.

Finally, Austrian singer and dancer Margot Werner died last Monday after a freak accident at age 74. Her performances were a staple of variety shows on German TV in the 1970s and 1980s.

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Get your free e-book

This is just a quick post to say that Countdown to Death, the first book in the Silencer series, is still available for free at XinXii throughout tomorrow.

How do you get it? Go here, click “Add to cart” and type in the following promotion code when checking out:

Pegasus12

The code is case sensitive by the way.

So what are you waiting for? Get your free e-book.

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Pegasus Pulp is one year old!

One July 3, 2011, Pegasus Pulp, my e-book publishing venture, opened its doors for business, which makes today our first anniversary.

It’s been an exciting year. I published 17 e-books, all short stories and novelettes, sold a bunch of them and had a lot of fun.

And in order to celebrate, Countdown to Death, the first Silencer novelette, is available for free at XinXii with the coupon code:

Pegasus12

How does it work? Go here, click on “Add to cart” and simply type in the coupon code when checking out.

The coupon code is valid for three days until July 6th. So pick it up, if you haven’t read the story yet and enjoy.

Over at the Pegasus Pulp blog, I also have a detailed breakdown of sales figures across platforms and titles, for those that care about such things.

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Two Football Poems

The Euro 2012 finally finished tonight, as Spain beat Italy 4:0 in the final. Germany had already lost against Italy in the semi-finale this Thursday.

I did not really have any strong feelings about the final either way, since I don’t particularly care about either Spain or Italy with regards to football.

Nonetheless, I wanted to share two football poems which I wrote two years ago during the 2010 World Cup. Since both poems are about Germany losing, I didn’t want to post them before the end of the tournament.

The first one was written after Germany lost against Serbia during the group stage:

After the Match

Mournful the vuvuzela blows,
it’s over now, all over now.

The car horns have fallen silent,
deserted are the streets,
huddled figures hurry home,
not a fan chant to be heard.

And the once so proud
red, black and gold
now lies discarded in the gutter,
blown away by a stray gust of wind
like so many chances to win the cup.

One more time, the soggy banner rises
defiantly flapping its last,
before it’s thrown, unceremoniously,
into the dustbin,
or maybe picked up and taken home
by some small child still blinded by hope

Cause after the match
is before the next.

The second poem was written shortly before the final (in which Spain beat the Netherlands) and inspired by a trip to the supermarket that same morning.

Ausverkauf

Spanish sherry
Spanish olives
Serrano ham

Dutch gouda
Dutch cucumbers
Dutch tomatoes

For Sale!
30 % off!

Payback for the finale.

Make-up
in black, red and gold
German flags
and vuvuzelas
60 % off!

cause no one needs
them anymore.

If you like football poetry, also check out the bilingual blog Liniendichter/Score Lines by Christophe Fricker and Ian Watson, whose football poems inspired me to try my hand at football poetry in the first place.

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