It’s time for another Masters-of-the-Universe-Piece Theatre photo story. The name “Masters-of-the-Universe-Piece Theatre” was coined by Kevin Beckett at the Whetstone Discord server. You can check out all the Masters-of-the-Universe-Piece Theatre Photo Stories here.
But first a bit of backstory: At the dawn of the Internet, reports about a rare brown-haired variant of the original He-Man action figure began to emerge. The figure was sometimes bare-chested, sometimes dressed in a black version of the Zodac armour and came with different red-brown weapons and was never found on a blister card. The origins of the figure were a mystery, though some people remembered getting him from a Mattel mail-in promotion in the early 1980s. For a while, it was thought that this was a tie-in promotion with the US bread company Wonder Bread, though eventually it turned out that the mysterious brown-haired He-Man figure actually originated with a “Buy three and get one free” promotion Mattel ran in the early 1980s. The promotion was quickly discontinued after a mother complained that the figure was underwhelming, which is why he is so rare. That mother would probably be stunned, if she knew what original brown-haired He-Man figures go for these days. There are several videos about the history of this figure by former Mattel employee Scott Neidlich, who solved the mystery of the brown-haired He-Man, here.
Even though the link to a Wonder Bread promotion turned out to be false, the brown-haired He-Man became known as a “Wonder Bread He-Man”. And when a new version of the mystery figure was made in the Masters of the Universe Classics line, the character was named Wun-Dar after the brand of bread. Wun-Dar was recast as a former champion of Grayskull and wielder of the Sword of Power, took on a life of his own and even showed up in Masters of the Universe: Revelation as one of the heroes hanging out in Preternia, which is Eternia’s version of Valhalla. Earlier this year, Mattel also made a Wun-Dar figure in the Masters of the Universe Origins line. It was sold as an online exclusive and sold out in minutes, but I was lucky enough to snag one.
And no, I could not resist posing him with a loaf of bread, because Wun-Dar is now forever associated with bread, even though he originally had nothing whatsoever to do with bread. Eventually, I will also get out the old Fimo and make him some action figure sized bread as an accessory.
“This is most excellent bread. Wun-Dar, foremost bread expert on Eternia, approves.”
Wun-Dar is a great figure, but he was missing something, namely a mount. Now in Masters of the Universe: Revelation, Wun-Dar is shown riding a dinosaur. So of course I had to get him a dinosaur.
The big Schleich dinosaurs work really well Masters of the Universe Origins figures and so I decided to get my Wun-Dar a Schleich Giganotosaurus, because the colours fit his colour scheme really well. The dinosaur arrived just before Christmas, so here is Wun-Dar with his new ride:
So let’s see what happens when we introduce Wun-Dar and his mount to the rest of the gang.
At since Wun-Dar lived approximately a century before Prince Adam, he and his new dinosaur pal return to the land of the living through the same portal that brought Adam, Teela and friends back from Preternia in Masters of the Universe: Revelation.
In Revelation, the Preternian heroes didn’t quite know what to make of Adam, who chose to hang around in the afterlife in his regular skinny body rather than his bulked up He-Man form, so they nicknamed Adam “Fleaman”, because he’s skinny and slight.
***
In the Eternian wilderness:
“Well, Giga, Eternia has sure changed a lot, since we last dwelled in the land of the living. Still, if I’m not mistaken, Eternos should be that way. And that’s where we’ll find our old pal Fleaman and the current king and of course, the most important things, wine and wenches.”
ROAR!
“And of course a good chunk of meat for you, Giga.”
ROAR!
***
Later, in the throne room of Eternos Palace:
“Hello, Your Majesty. Wun-Dar is here and ready to serve.”
ROAR!
“What on Eternia? Who are you and what is that… that thing doing in my throne room? Guards, guards! Intruder alert!”
“Halt, stranger! State your business!”
“Relax. Like I said, I’m Wun-Dar. You know, legendary hero, champion of Grayskull and wielder – well, former wielder of the Sword of Power? And this is Giga, my trusty mount. I came through a portal from Preternia because… well, even paradise gets boring eventually, I guess. And besides, Fleaman – I mean, Adam – said that you guys needed help with someone named Skeleton? Is that right? Stupid name, at any rate.”
“It’s Skeletor, young man. And what exactly do you and this… this thing want here in my throne room?”
“Giga and I want to help fight this Skeletor. Also, I hope to sample some of the local wine and wenches.”
“And what makes you think that I’ll just hire anybody who barges into my throne room, young man? There are proper channels and procedures for this sort of thing.”
“Well, if you don’t need a warrior, I also make really great bread. I used to be a baker boy in Tunderia, before I ventured forth to see Eternia and fight evil in all its forms. And sample wine and wenches, of course.”
“Another alarm. What now? Skeletor, the Horde, the Snake People or… Wun-Dar?! What in Eternia are you doing here?”
“Fleaman – ahem, Adam – is that really you? Cause you sure fill out nicely, when you call down the power.”
“Adam, do you know this person?”
“Uhm, we met in Preternia, while I was dead. It’s a long story.”
“Captain, what should we do?”
“Stand down, Corporal. For now.”
“Wun-Dar, man, what are you doing here? I thought you loved it in Preternia.”
“Well, I did. But you were right. Just going on pretend hunts all the time does get boring after a while. I missed the action, the fighting, the wine and the wenches, if you know what I mean. The only wenches in Preternia were Sharella and Kuduk and neither of them were ever interested.”
“But how did you get here, you and Giga?”
“Same way you did, through that portal in Grayskull Tower. After all, you said we were welcome to follow you at any time.”
“Well yes, I guess I did invite you all to come. Anyway, it’s great to see you back in the land of the living, old friend. And Giga, of course.”
“Good to see you again, too, Fleaman… I mean Adam. I’m as surprised as anybody, but I kind of missed you.”
ROAR!
“Adam, would you mind introducing me to your ‘friend’?”
“Actually, I’d love to know who that is, too, brother. Cause he’s rather handsome.”
“Meanwhile, I’d love to know how that guy got past my guards.”
“Of course. Father, this is Wun-Dar of Tunderia. He’s a former champion of Grayskull and wielder of the Power Sword. We met in Preternia.”
“So I gather.
“Wun-Dar, this is my father, King Randor of Eternia.”
“Pleased to meet you, Sire. Wait a moment, your father is the king? So that means you’re a prince?”
“Uhm, yes…”
“Why did you never say anything, man?”
“I guess it never really came up. And besides, we were dead. It’s not as if titles and all that really mattered.”
“All this time and I never had any idea that you were royalty. Like Grayskull and He-Ro, come to think of it. Damn, was I the only commoner ever to wield the Power Sword? But first things first. Cause I spy wenches, so why don’t you introduce me to those lovely ladies?”
“Wun-Dar, you’ll remember Teela from Preternia.”
“Oh yes, that wench you were moaning over all the bloody time.”
Giggle.
“Ahem, actually…”
“Well, I definitely remember you, Wun-Dar. After all, Adam and I knocked you and your beast out of the hunt.”
“As if I could forget. Still, you certainly clean up nicely, Teela. I almost didn’t recognise you with the different hair and outfit. It’s so much more becoming than that mannish cut you wore in Preternia.”
“Ahem, Wun-Dar, did I mention that Teela is the Captain of the Royal Guard as well as my girlfriend.”
“Oh, so you finally got your cherry popped, your wine uncorked, your toast buttered. Congratulations, Fleaman.”
Giggle.
“I’m sorry. There really is no excuse for him.”
“If you’re not going to punch him, Adam, I will. Champion of Grayskull or not.”
“Former champion.”
“But who is this lovely lady? I’m certain I’ve never met you before, because how could I forget such beauty?”
“I’m She-Ra, He-Man’s twin sister and wielder of the Sword of Protection. It’s always a pleasure to meet friends of my brother.”
“Oh, the pleasure is all mine, beautiful.”
“Ahem, Wun-Dar, did you miss the fact that she’s my sister?”
“Oh come on, Fleaman, it’s not fair hogging all the wenches for yourself.”
ROAR!
“That’s a very interesting beast you have there, Wun-Dar.”
“Thank you, my lady. Her name is Giga, short for Giganotosaurus. She has big teeth, but she only uses them on the enemies of Eternia.”
“Well hello, Giga. It’s lovely to meet you, too.”
ROAR!
“Some of these creatures would make pretty good patrol mounts for my guards. You didn’t bring back any more of those critters by any chance, did you?”
“I’m afraid not, my fair Captain. The fields of Preternia are full of roaming dinosaurs, but the trip is one way only.”
ROAR!
“You’re a good girl, Giga. Maybe I should introduce to my friend Sorrowful, the dragon, since he’s always very lonely.”
ROAR!
“Enough! That… that thing has just pooped onto the floor of my throne room.”
“Yeah, sorry about that. Come on, Giga, don’t embarrass me. We’re among royalty here.”
“Get that creature out of my throne room NOW! And someone clean up the mess.”
“Uhm, Wun-Dar, maybe you should take Giga to the royal stables. And please, make sure she remembers that the horses are not for eating.”
“Okay, will do, Fleaman. Your Majesty, fair ladies, I’ll be seeing you around.”
ROAR!
“Corporal Daegar, remove that mess from the throne room floor.”
“With all due respect, Captain, I don’t think that cleaning up dinosaur poo was part of my job description.”
“It is now, Corporal. Understood?”
“Yes, Captain.”
“Well, he’s certainly a bit rough around the edges, but I like him.”
“You’re welcome to him, She-Ra. After all, I have nabbed myself the greatest and noblest champion of them all.”
“You certainly have… interesting friends, son.”
“Sorry about that, Dad. When I invited the other heroes of Preternia to follow me, I’d hoped for King Grayskull or maybe He-Ro, not him. Though he is brave and will be a great help in the fight against the Evil Forces of Skeletor and the Horde and the Snake People. And he really does bake great bread.”
“So you’ve truly met King Grayskull, son? What is he like? Just as impressive as the legends say?”
“Grayskull wasn’t at all like I imagine him. I mean, since he’s my ancestor, I always imagined him to look like me – blonde hair, pale skin, blue eyes. But he doesn’t look like me at all. Instead, he has dark skin and dark hair. Oh yes, and he’s huge, even when he’s not powered up. And yes, he is as impressive as the legends say.”
***
The bit about King Grayskull is a reference to the fact that some fans were upset that the character of King Grayskull, heroic ancestor of He-Man and She-Ra, was portrayed as white and blonde in the 2002 cartoon and as a black man with dreadlocks in Masters of the Universe: Revelation. Of course, there are several centuries, perhaps even millennia between Prince Adam and King Grayskull, so Adam having a black ancestor is not at all unbelievable.
King Grayskull also appeared briefly in the Netflix CGI He-Man series, where he is a bald white man with a black beard. He’s also evil due to resorting to dark havoc magic to defeat the Snake People and was about to destroy all of Eternia and the entire universe, before the Sorceress stopped him. Oddly enough, that seems to bother absolutely nobody.
And that’s it for today, folks. I hope you enjoyed this Masters-of-the-Universe-Piece Theatre Photo Story, because there will be more.
Disclaimer: I don’t own any of these characters, I just bought some toys, took photos of them and wrote little scenes to go with those photos. All characters are copyright and trademark their respective owners.
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I see Wun-dar’s bread talents went far beyond the boring tasteless loaf he’s named for.
I once got a Han Solo in Stormtrooper outfit by eating enough of some overly sugary cereal to get enough box tops to mail in. He was pretty boring too.
In future, will Wun-dar also tell Malcolm to shut up? And why isn’t the afterlife “Posternia”? Tune in next time…
Fortunately, I have nothing even remotely as bland as Wonderbread, so sourdough bread it was. Though I think I might have had some brioche somewhere, too.
Most of these mail-away premium toys are a little disappointing, because the companies tried to make them as cheaply as possible by repainting existing figures or parts. So Wun-Dar is a repainted He-Man figure and that Star Wars premium was Han Solo’s head attached to a Stormtrooper body.
That said. as a kid I was always disappointed because most of those mail away promotions were not offered in Europe. There was only one where I actually got something, for a French toyline. It was a little flower fairy figure.
Once Wun-Dar and Malcolm meet, I’m sure he’ll tell Malcolm to shut up. As for calling the afterlife Preternia rather than Posternia, you’ll have to ask Kevin Smith and Rob David, who created Masters of the Universe: Revelation and used the name. Though the name Preternia originally came from the 1980s minicomics, where it was not the afterlife, but the name for prehistoric Eternia, which is also why there are dinosaurs in Preternia. Plus, dinosaurs are cool.
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