Masters-of-the-Universe-Piece Theatre: “Pig Invasion”

It’s time for another Masters-of-the-Universe-Piece Theatre photo story. The name “Masters-of-the-Universe-Piece Theatre” was coined by Kevin Beckett at the Whetstone Discord server. You can check out all the Masters-of-the-Universe-Piece Theatre Photo Stories here.

I have had some new arrivals today. The first is a second Eternian Royal Guard, so King Randor now has two soldiers to guard him. I would have preferred even more Royal Guards, but since they were exclusive to some US-only store, they’re quite pricey in Germany, so two will have to suffice.

The other new arrival is Pig-Head, archenemy of Sun-Man. Now Sun-Man and his supporting cast were not part of the Masters of the Universe line originally, but part of the toyline Rulers of the Sun, which was created to offer Masters of the Universe type figures with some much needed diversity added, since Masters of the Universe was almost all-white in the 1980s with only one black character each in the He-Man and She-Ra lines as well as two Asian characters, both villains. So a black mother, who was frustrated that her young son couldn’t find any Masters of the Universe figures that looked like him (Clamp-Champ, the lone black Masters of the Universe character, only came out in 1987, towards the end of the line), took matters in her own hand and created Sun-Man and the Rulers of the Sun. There’s a lot more background on Sun-Man, the Rulers of the Sun line and its creation here and here.

The Rulers of the Sun toys were never sold in Germany, so I am entirely unfamiliar with these characters and their backstory and have no nostalgic attachment to them. Therefore, I buy them on a case by case basis, depending on whether I like the figure and whether I can get it for a good price. Now I have a soft spot for pigs in general and the villain Pig-Head is a delightfully goofy character, a pig with a Samurai-style helmet in the most mid 1980s colour scheme ever. So once I spotted him for a good price, I bought him.

Since I like taking photos of new arrivals, I made a short photo story to post on Twitter before Twitter goes belly-up altogether, something which is looking increasingly likely.

So let’s see what happens when Pig-Head invades Eternia.

In the throne room in Eternos palace:

Though I now have two Royal Guards, there’s only one guard in the picture, because the second guard is currently on another shelf and forgot to fetch him.

“Your report, Captain Teela?”

“The Royal Guards are currently practicing aerial manoeuvres on their Sky Sleds, Sire. And the outer perimeter is secure. Prince Adam and I made sure of that ourselves.”

“Ah, so that’s why Adam was late for lunch… again. Still, my son’s recent dedication to duty is certainly admirable. You’re a good influence on him, Captain”

“Thank you, Sire. Adam is… ahem… very enthusiastic. About protecting the realm, I mean.”

“Snicker.”

“I’m glad to hear it, Captain.”

BOOM!

I didn’t kid about the very mid-1980s colour scheme of blue, pink and neon green.

“By Zoar, what now? Is Skeletor attacking again!”

“Surrender, King Randor, and give up the throne to Pig-Head, Lord of the Swine.”

“Sigh, Skeletor is really scraping the bottom of the barrel with regard to henchmen these days, is he? What’s the matter? Were Stinkor and Clawful too busy that he had to send you?”

“Skeletor? Pig-Head works for neither man nor skeleton. Pig-Head only works for himself. And you will surrender to Pig-Head or face the consequences.”

Those boots look like something I might have worn in appoximately 1984.

“Whoever you work for, it doesn’t matter. Captain Teela, would you please remove this overgrown porkchop from my throne room?”

“With pleasure, Sire.”

“A girl? You truly think a girl can beat the Lord of the Swine? Don’t insult Pig-Head and summon your champion, He-Man.”

“Not a girl, but the Captain of the Guard. And I don’t need He-Man to deal with the likes of you, Pig-Man.”

“Pig-Head, insolent female. The name is Pig-Head.”

TWACK!

“And now you’re just pulled pork. What? Adam isn’t the only one who makes silly puns.”

“Thank you for dealing with this porcine nuissance, Captain.”

“My pleasure, Sire.”

“Pig-Head shall not forget this. Pig-Head shall contemplate his revenge.”

“Well, you’ll have all the time in the world to contemplate… in the palace dungeons. Corporal, take this joint of ham away and lock him up.”

“Of course, Captain.”

***

And that’s it for today, folks. I hope you enjoyed this Masters-of-the-Universe-Piece Theatre Photo Story. There will be more stories coming in the future, because I’m having a lot of fun doing these as well as plenty of ideas. Besides, finally having a King Randor figure makes a lot of stories possible that I couldn’t do before, including the secret origin of Skeletor.

Disclaimer: I don’t own any of these characters, I just bought some toys, took photos of them and wrote little scenes to go with those photos. All characters are copyright and trademark their respective owners.